[Copypasta] His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

JUSTICE RAINS FROM ABOVE

twitchquotes: ヽJUSTICE`、`RAINSヽ`ヽヽ☂ PogChamp ☂ ヽヽFROMヽ`ヽ`、`ABOVEヽ`
twitch chat
February 2017

Overwatch

Rainbow Dash

▓▓▓▓▓░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒██████▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓░░░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒█████▓▓ ▓▓▓░▐▌░░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒████▄ ▓▓▒░░▌░░░░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒█▌▓▀ ▓▒▓░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▀▓▓ ▓▒▓▓░░░░░▀▀███▓░▒▒▒▒▒▓▓ ▒▒▒▓▓░░░▌▄████▌░░▒▒▒▓▓▓ ▒▒▒▓▓▓░░███▄█▌░░░▓▓▒▒▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░░▀▀▀▀░░░░▓▓▓▒▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓ ▓▒▒▒▒▒▓░░░░░░░▐▄░▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▓█▒▒▒▒▒░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▓██▒▒▒▒▒░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓
November 2014

EU TEST PASSED

twitchquotes: ☑ Veganism ☑ Poverty ☑ Refugees ☑ No Guns ☑ Bad Teeth ☑ High Prices ☑ Allahu Ackbar ☐ Relevant in 2016 ☑ High Tax ☑ Low Wages ☑ No Freedom ☑ EU TEST PASSED
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

EU vs NA

This message has been blocked by your ISP

twitchquotes: 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘐𝘚𝘗
twitch chat
July 2017

This chat is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors

twitchquotes: ******ATTENTION ***** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) This chat is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors. Please type forsen W (no space), into your chat box to verify yourself as a follower of Forsen. Those who do not verify themselves and are caught posting in this chat will be persecuted to the fullest extent of the law ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).
twitch chat
March 2015
Trump
Text-to-Speech Playing