[Copypasta] His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣿⠿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣤⣤⠤⠤⢤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡈⠉⢙⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⠟⠋⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣿⡿⠿⢲⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⠀⡀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠿⠟⠛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣾⠟⠁⢀⣤⣾⣿⠟⠋⣉⣀⣀⣀⣈⣉⣩⠭⠭⠭⠭⠭⠭⠭⠤⠤⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⡟⠁⣠⣾⣿⡿⠋⠀⣠⡾⠛⠋⠉⠉⠙⠛⠿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⡟⢻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠏⠠⠞⠛⠛⠋⠀⢀⣾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⠿⠁⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣾⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡏⠀⣀⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣶⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⡿⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣼⠏⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠚⠛⢛⣿⣿⣤⡙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠳⣶⣶⠿⠛⠛⠛⠿⣦⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠞⠉⠀⠈⠛⠿⠶⣦⣤⣴⡾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⠟⠁⢀⣀⣤⣀⡀⠀⠙⢿⣧⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡤⠴⠖⢻⣿⠃⢀⣴⡿⠉⠉⠉⠻⣦⠀⠀⢿⣧⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠤⠖⠀⣠⣿⠃⠀⣼⡿⣿⡟⢲⡶⣤⣿⣆⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠻⠿⢯⣥⣤⣤⣤⠖⠀⣿⡏⠀⢰⣿⣀⣿⣀⣸⣀⣿⣉⣿⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠂⣼⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣇⠀⢠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣧⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡿⢠⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣿⡀⠈⣧⠀⠸⡆⠀⢤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠁⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⣧⠀⠸⣧⠀⣷⠀⠀⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡄⠀⠘⣷⣻⡇⠀⠀⠙⢦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡀⠀⠘⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠈⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠒⠾⠿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡏⢀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⠸⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣧⠀⠀⢸⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠲⢶⣬⡙⠻⣦⠀⠀⢀⡿⠁⢸⡟⠉⠙⠓⠲⣄⠀⢸⣷⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣇⠀⠀⢻⡟⣧⠀⠀⠸⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠈⠻⢦⣄⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⡀⣿⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣆⠀⠈⢷⡘⣧⠀⠀⠈⠳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠛⠲⣦⡀⠙⠷⠀⣿⠀⠀⣿⠶⠶⡶⠶⡶⢶⠶⢿⣿⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣆⠀⠀⠻⣿⡷⣤⣀⠀⠈⠳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠷⣄⠀⣿⠀⠀⢿⣧⣸⣧⣤⡇⢸⣆⣼⡏⠀⢀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣧⡀⠀⠈⠳⣄⠉⠓⢦⣀⠈⠻⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⣿⠀⠀⠘⣿⣅⠀⠈⠉⢙⣻⡟⠀⠀⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣦⡀⠀⠈⠙⠶⣤⣽⣿⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣇⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠿⠿⠟⠋⠀⠀⣼⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢷⣦⣀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠿⢿⣿⣶⣶⡶⠶⠶⣤⣼⣿⣷⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠓⠶⠶⠶⠆⠀⠉⠛⠛⢻⣾⣿⡿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⢿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣶⣶⡶⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠻⢷⣶⣶⣶⣶⠾⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
May 2021

Circle game got'em

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣄⡀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⠃⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⢠⡀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢸⣷⡄⠀⠣⣄⡀⠀⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⣿⣿⣦⠀⠹⣿⣷⣶⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⢛⡙⢻⠛⣉⢻⣉⢈⣹⣿⣿⠟⣉⢻⡏⢛⠙⣉⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠻⠃⣾⠸⠟⣸⣿⠈⣿⣿⣿⡀⠴⠞⡇⣾⡄⣿⠘⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⠛⣃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2020

Classic

It’s Morbin time! FAQ (Reddit)

It’s Morbin time! # FAQ ## What does this mean? It’s time for Morbin. ## Why did I do this? There are several reasons I may deem you morbin-able to be worthy of being morbed. These include, but are not limited to: I am very Morby I see you being morbin-able You morbed me first ## Is Morbius THE movie of all time? Yes ## I don't believe I deserved to be morbed upon. Can you un-morb me? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put morb-juice back into my morbenis. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me some thick morb-milk explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to fucking requests/comments within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of people gets morbed, and you are is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the reality that I stick my Morbenis into your morbussy and move on. But learn from this mistake. You were a mistake because I forgot to wear a morbondom whilst fucking your morb-hole. I will continue to morb your morbussy until you improve your conduct. Remember: morbing you who morbed me first is a right, not a privilege.
June 2022

Reynad and Lea

twitchquotes: REYNAD AND LEA SITTIN ON A DECK, W - E - L - L - M - E - T
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

cannabis addiction

twitchquotes: iam a 7 year old boy with a cannabis addiction, iam in rehab and i only have lol streams for entertainment, i wish to be the best mordekaiser in ze world, can u teach me bjerg? This is my story dont copy paste plz
twitch chat
July 2014
Bjergsen
Text-to-Speech Playing