[Copypasta] His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

AITA for invading Ukraine?

Using my alt account because of personal reasons. So anyway, I[69M(literally)] am a high government official of a country with a strong military. Anyway, I am clinically diagnosed with Invasiontia[for anyone who doesn't know it's meaning, it basically means my mind forces me to invade countries, very few people are diagnosed with it(like Adolf Hitler), so i guess it makes me quirky uwu], so i really can't be the one to blame. I do what i like, usually, but people often judge me for living my life on my own terms. My distant relative, who has a history of playing fortnite and being antivax, being a furry, pedophile, and being a baby yoda hater called me today and abused me verbally, and told me what i was doing was wrong. I was heartbroken by their words. Not only that, Emily[She/They 13 diagnosed with 255 mental illnesses] made a really mean tweet against me today. She compared me to Hitler (I know Hitler and I have the same mental illness, but it doesn't mean I am as much of an asshole like he is, right?). All this negativity is severely affecting my mental health(i come from a country where mental health isn't given a lot of importance and also my country isn't very supportive of gay people), and i am now contemplating suicide by shooting myself in the head. Everyone thinks i am an asshole, what do you think reddit? AITA?
March 2022

Am I The Asshole?

Russian Ukrainian War

2 wins 3 losses in promo placements PepeLaugh

twitchquotes: PepeLaugh 👉 ✅ ✅ ❌ ❌ ❌
twitch chat
February 2020

League of Legends

Creepy NaM smile

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣉⡉⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣉⢭⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣠⣶⡿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⡳⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢣⣾⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣀⠄⠙⠻⣞⣞⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢡⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⠙⣞⠼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢼⣿⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠻⡀⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⣸⡿⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠃⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⠄⢀⣾⣿⡇⠄⢠⠄⠄⣹⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⠄⢰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⠟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠻⣿⠄⣠⣄⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⣀⡀⢸⣿⣦⡀⣤⣉⡛⠛⠛⡛⠛⠉⠠⠐⢰⣿⢠⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣞⣿⣿⣷⣄⠛⠁⢹⢗⡿⢉⠁⠄⣠⣿⣣⣿⣿⡟⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣼⣬⣧⣥⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2019

Take my energy Kripp

twitchquotes: ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ MorphinTime TAKE MY ENERGY KRIPP ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ MorphinTime
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

I sexually Identify as Fox McCloud

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as Fox McCloud. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of defending my Melee Championship at EVO. People say to me that a person being Fox McCloud is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, Mishun Complete. I’m having Mango inject me with tech skill and mindgames. From now on I want you guys to call me “Fox” and respect my right to shine and upsmash. If you can’t accept me you’re a spaciephobe and need to check your tierlist privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
October 2016

Super Smash Bros

I sexually Identify as

Text-to-Speech Playing