[Copypasta] His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Will this affect my Wayne

twitchquotes: Hello, Reynad I have been the butler of a very prestigious family for a very long time. Couple I work for has just recently been shot and killed, I have been left to take care of him but, he has resort to a life of crime fighting which is very dangerous. Will this affect my Wayne.
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Ameng be thy name

twitchquotes: Our father who rolls in heaven, Ameng be thy name. thy goats may come, thy will be shattered, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily cheese, and forgive us our throwing, as we forgive those who throw against us, and lead us not into Mayhem, but deliver us from Justice.
twitch chat
May 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

I've always wanted to be an octopusserino

twitchquotes: ive always wanted to be an octopusserino but everytime i try to tell someone they make fun of me. well ive had it up to here. today is the day i put my tentacles down. im sick and tired of people telling me what i can and cant be. i will be getting surgery to split my legs like pasterinos so i can have tentacles if you copy and pasterino my story to mock me i swear i will ink all over your face!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

BatChest

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October 2021

Emote

I tried to go help

Damn saw this one guy getting beat up by 2 other dudes today so I tried to go help, didn’t stand a chance against the 3 of us.
March 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing