[Copypasta] Holding Galactic Virgins

Virgin Galactic Holdings changes name to Holding Galactic Virgins, and announces it’s changing its business model to extraterrestrial prostitution. Edit: SpaceX, not to be outdone, changes to SpaceSex
December 2020

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/kb0pf8/daily_discussion_thread_for_december_11_2020/gfdqqxj
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Google employees complaints

Reading Google employees complaints about workplace is like watching Becky cry on social media how her life's ruined when she only got a new Hyundai for graduation instead of the audi she asked. Bitch give me that 300k job and I will deal with "my voice not being heard" all day every day.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Jeff Bezos vs Elon Musk

Jeff Bezos -Bald -Exwife took half his networth -Second richest person Elon Musk -Grew back full head of hair -Has girlfriend, allegedly had a threesome with Amber Heard and Cara Delevingne -Richest person TSLA > AMZN
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

Careful bulls, dangerous things past the moon

Careful tomorrow bulls, there are dangerous things past the moon. ✨ .-' `'. ✨ / \ . ☀️ ☀️ | ; ✨ | | ___.--, _.._ |0) ~ (0) | _.---'`__.-( (_. ✨ __.--'`_.. '.__.\ '--. \_.-' ,.--'` `""` ( ,.--'` ',__ /./; ;, '.__.'` __ _`) ) .---.__.' / | |\ \__..--"" """--.,_ . ☀️ `---' .'.''-._.-'`_./ /\ '. \ _.-~~~````~~~-._`-.__.' | | .' _.-' | | \ \ '. `~---` ✨ \ \/ .' \ \ '. '-._) ✨ ✨ \/ / \ \ `=.__`~-. jgs / /\ `) ) / / `"".`\ , _.-'.'\ \ / / ( ( / / . ☀️ `--~` ) ) .-'.' '.'. | ( (/` ( (` ) ) '-; ` '-; (-' ✨ ✨ ✨ ☀️ 🚀 <--- BULLS ✨ ☀️ ✨ 🌙 ☀️ ☀️ ☀️ ✨ 🌎 ✨ 🌝 ☀️ ✨ ✨
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December 2020

WallStreetBets

GME short squeeze

Lets dumb this down for you apes: - Let's say 5 banana's currently cost 10 dollar - One ape on the market has 5 banana's - Snake asks to borrow 5 banana's for a bit and instead sells the 5 banana's thinking price will go down soon (shorting). he thinks he can buy them later for less and give them back to ape, so he make's profit on the difference. - Group of apes notice what stupid snakes are doing and decide to buy all banana's on the market until snakes have no other choice than to buy from the group of apes in order to return what they borrowed - If group of apes stay strong then price will go 🚀🚀🚀
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Unrealized losses

She runs her hand through your thinning hair and laughs. “What?” you ask absentmindedly. You’re looking at Futures, and you’re surprised to see them red. “I want you to play with me.” She says it playfully, but the single ounce of you that isn’t totally aloof realizes she said this in earnest. And so you do. You throw your phone, and you pin her to the sofa, then the ground. You both roll about, wrestling, like lion cubs. Kissing, lightly biting. Sometime later, you both stop, breathing hard. She grabs an open bottle of red wine, and you pass it back and forth. Eventually she says, “I want to do that more.” But you’ve already found your phone again to check Futures. Still red. “Uh huh,” you say, distracted. She stares at you for a long moment, but you don’t realize it. Silently, she gets up and goes to bed, and you don’t say a word because you don’t notice. She hasn’t left you yet, but she will soon. Unrealized losses.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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