Step 1: Go to his office
Step 2: distract him
Step 3: Put a fish on his desk
Step 4: He'll laugh at it and say "Who put this fish on my desk"
Step 5: Break his kneecaps
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Things escalated from there
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I lost my virginity while listening to this song 5 years ago, it's a funny story really.. i had just finished my gym workout and i was in the locker room all sweaty, and in walks this leather dressed jabroni.. he seemed confused as to where he was.. i told him he might have gotten the wrong door, then he got very rude and said "fuck you", then i said "nah fuck you leatherman" and then things escalated from there
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Eminem Stan lyrics
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Dear kripp, I wrote you but still ain't callin' I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin' Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Man how's dexter? My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father. My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7 But she don't know you like I know you kripp, no one does She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up, you gotta call me man I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose Sincerely yours, Stan P.S. we should be together too
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Kripp
Titsa me, Mario!
Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call
So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. Iโm a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but Iโm not sure what to say in interviews now if Iโm asked why I left this job. Any advice?
I love seeing TRUMP lose
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I love seeing TRUMP lose, it's my daily medicine, my weekly energy, my monthly inspiration and my yearly motivation. His loss is the only reason i'm still alive, i was born to love and enjoy the failure that he has achieved.
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