"I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!' I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU Coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux." The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows were compiled with GCC, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even if you were correct, you won't be for long." With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now
I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now, moving from place to place, keeping ahead of the vaxmaxers, never staying anywhere too long, never letting my face become known. "It's great being vaxmaxed isn't it" the shopkeep says vacantly, to nobody in particular. In keeping with the act I reply to the Heinz Baked Beans Substitute 6 Pack (No Plastic) in my hand, something unrelated, with what I hope is a slightly bemused tone. It takes a lot longer to do my shopping these days, I can't simply march through the shop in an orderly fashion, taking what I need in a single trip, I have to absent mindedly shuffle back and forward between the aisles, never really displaying any intent. As unpresent as they are, the vaxmaxed would notice if I was too focused, too alert. A loud smashing sound in the distance almost blows my cover, I notice, and focus on the sound. The vaxmaxed around me slowly aim their distant gaze on me, but I'm able to save myself, I continue my neck jerk and turn it in to a series of spasms, I drop to the floor convulsing, the vaxmaxed around me quickly lose interest and continue on with their day. "That means it's working" one elderly lady comments to her milk as she passes. I continue the charade long enough to filter out most of the vaxmaxed sharing the aisle. It takes a while, and no insubstantial amount of sweat on my part, but I make it to the checkout. A morbidly obese woman directs the horde at the tills, seemingly oblivious to the cacophony of aberrant scan noises and blinking red lights above the entirely self service super checkout. I wait dutifully, not wanting to be noticed, not wanting to be set upon by the Asda Security Vax Checker team, it had taken all my best bluffing to get past them at the door, I almost chuckled when they believed my vax card was in the post but it was quickly stifled, a chuckled would have given me away, a chuckle would have seen me held down and injected with science juice.
COVID
Coronavirus
Hey Sing_sing why did you say you can't kick allies when Envy kicked you from Cloud9
Take my energy Kripp
twitchquotes:
༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ 
TAKE MY ENERGY KRIPP ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
TAKE MY ENERGY KRIPP ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
twitch chat
Kripp
Eating chicken wings beside Tenz
twitchquotes:
one time i was eating chicken wings beside tenz at a pub in canada, and he is wearing white sweatpants and the black and red SEN jersey and i was eating a flat and i took a bite out of it and the bone popped out and flip up in the air, and i swore to god that time slow down and i was like "omg holy shit, somebody stop this", i couldnt react whilst watching the bone spinning around and then the chicken wing drops but tenz moves his leg away while the bone was split-second away from touching his white sweatpants and i look dead in his eyes and said "omg dude, im so sorry" and tenz that totally silence all the time while enjoying his borovička look over towards me and said "i knew it would happen" then look away, stood up and walk off, i never been so awe in my life and then i knew this guy is and will be a great valorant player, this guy is cold as fuck like his in-game name and he is fast as hell its how he dodges the chicken wing bone and its how he fucked 100t balls deep while keeping his composure, its no coincidence, im telling you its all interconnected because what kind of person you're in real life, translated to how you are as a player in valorant.
twitch chat
TenZ
Valorant
Spending New years eve on twitch BibleeThump
twitchquotes:
No job ✔ 
Mom's house ✔ No talents ✔ No gf ✔ No friends ✔ No midnight kiss ✔ Spending New years eve on twitch ✔ Must be us
Mom's house ✔ No talents ✔ No gf ✔ No friends ✔ No midnight kiss ✔ Spending New years eve on twitch ✔ Must be us
twitch chat