[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Blue Lives Matter (Smurfs)

blue people don't exist. this is offensive. i have never in my life met a blue person. SMURFS ARENT REAL GUYS. IM TIRED OF SEEING THIS BLUE LIVES MATTER, SMURFS ARE NOT REAL THERE ARE NO BLUE PEOPLE. and even if they were real, they do not matter. i hate smurfs. theyre ugly and short. i could step on them. they have big noses. i just want to pick them up and bite their heads like laffy taffy. DO NOT STAN BLUE LIVES
October 2021

Kniferino to cut off your dongerino

twitchquotes: แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แด›สœษชs ษชs สœแด€า“แดœ! ษช แด€แด แด„แดแดษชษดษข แด›แด แด‡sษขษด แด€s แดกแด‡สŸสŸ, แด€ษดแด… ษขแดœแด‡ss แดกสœแด€แด› ษช แด€แด ส™ส€ษชษดษขษชษดษข แดกษชแด›สœ แดแด‡? แด€ สŸษชแด›แด›สŸแด‡ แด‹ษดษชา“แด‡ส€ษชษดแด แด›แด แด„แดœแด› แดา“า“ สแดแดœส€ แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€ษชษดแด า“แดส€ แด„สœแด‡แด€แด›ษชษดษข แดษด แดแด‡! ษชา“ ษช sแด‡แด‡ แด€ sแดœแด„แด„แดœส™แดœs แดกษชแด›สœ สแดแดœ ษช แด€แด ษขแดษชษดษข แด›แด sแด›แด€ส€แด› แด…แด€แด›ษชษดษข แด›ส€แดœแดแด˜! แด…แดษดแด› แดแด€แด‹แด‡ แดแด‡ แด…แด แด›สœแด€แด› แด›สœแดแดœษขสœ. แด˜สŸแดข แด„แดแดแด‡ ส™แด€แด„แด‹.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Brofist

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆ โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–„โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
February 2015
Kripp

Remittance-based Number Generation

twitchquotes: R-N-G Remittance-based Number Generation, was a phrased developed by Blizzard in 2013 Hearthstone Beta(2014 official release). The phrase describes Blizzard's sentiment off *** YOU PAY US MORE MONIES RIGHT *** NOW. If the player does not pay $4.50 average per week, ugly loss accruing algorithms are enabled.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

Kripp's blood salt level is at a dangerous high

twitchquotes: Hei Kripparina, Dr. Enrico Salterino here. Your blood PJSalt level has reached a dangerous heigh. Reduce the PJSalt level immediately or face severe health implications. PLZ COPYPASTERION to save Kripparians life!!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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