I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Hello Mr. Santana this is Michelle Obama
twitchquotes:
Hello Mr. Santana this is Michelle Obama, i'm loving your stream but all this feeding is making USA looks like garbage, i'm sending my husband (BARACK OBAMA) to shut you down.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
League of Legends
EU vs NA
Macaiyla left long ago...
twitchquotes:
The year is 2050, league is played by less than 100 people. T1 has finally reached Masters, "Macaiyla I did it!" he yells excitedly. The sound echoes through the empty trailer. Macaiyla left long ago...
twitch chat
Tyler1
League of Legends
Response to "who gives a shit"
Well you see, if you didn't care you wouldn't have said "Literally no one gives a shit" in the first place. If you truly did not care, you would of completely ignored the conversation from the very start. The fact that you said that just shows the childishness inside of you. All that saying "no one gives a shit" does is make you out to be an entitled, lower person who craves attention by trying to seem cool. Even if you do not care about this statement, the mere fact that you are saying "no one gives a shit" says a lot about you. And shows that you are in fact an unlikable individual. Regardless of if you care of not, these are goddamn facts, and facts do not care about your little peabrained fucking pissbaby feelings. No amount of not caring will change your unlikableness. Nobody will forget this moment and it'll be embedded into our minds for months, even years. Grow up a little before even thinking about responding to another innocent person with "No one gives a shit".
EU calls NA
twitchquotes:
π 
HELLO NA? π EU HERE π ARE YOU GOING TO GET OUT OF GROUPS THIS YEAR?? π
HELLO NA? π EU HERE π ARE YOU GOING TO GET OUT OF GROUPS THIS YEAR?? π
twitch chat
LCS
League of Legends
EU vs NA
There was a bug in the toilet
twitchquotes:
WHEN I SAT DOWN β¬οΈ TO PEE π§ββοΈπ¦ THERE WAS A BUG π IN THE TOILET π½ BUT I THOUGHT π IT WAS DROWNED ππ» ββββ N WHEN I GOT UP β¬οΈ βΌοΈIT WASN'T β THERE 
IM SOBBING π IS IT IN MY FUCKING π BUTTHOLE πβ WHERE IS ITβοΈβοΈβοΈ
IM SOBBING π IS IT IN MY FUCKING π BUTTHOLE πβ WHERE IS ITβοΈβοΈβοΈ
twitch chat