[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Approximately 108 billion people have lived on this planet. Who asked?

According to world population studies, approximately 108 billion people have lived on this planet. Assuming that the average lifespan of all these people was 25, there has been around 2.7 trillion years of life, if we multiply this by the number of days in a year (365), there is a total of 985,500,000,000,000 days of life (985.5 trillion days). Not once in any of those days did anybody ask.
November 2021

Who Asked?

What is left of the Kripp we all loved?

twitchquotes: ๏ผฎ๏ฝ ๏ผฐ๏ฝ๏ผฅ๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ผฏ๏ผช๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝŽ๏ฝŒ๏ผŽ ๏ผท๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ†๏ฝ” ๏ฝ๏ฝ† ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ผŸ ๏ผฎ๏ฝ๏ฝ— ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ผŒ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ“๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ“๏ผŒ ๏ฝ„๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ ๏ฝŠ๏ฝ•๏ฝ‰๏ฝƒ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’ ๏ผด๏ผณ๏ผญ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Yee

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
May 2016

New banger (from r/conservativerap)

Aye ๐Ÿ˜‚ Yuh ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ‘€ Uh ๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜ค Skrrrt ๐Ÿ’จ๐Ÿค” I ๐Ÿ‘ hate ๐Ÿ˜ก people ๐Ÿ‘ซ who have a different ๐Ÿ˜ก skin ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘‘ color ๐ŸŽจ from me (x32) instrumental ๐ŸŽบ break ๐Ÿ’” I ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘€ hate ๐Ÿ˜ก๐ŸŒš people ๐Ÿ‘ซ who have a different ๐Ÿ‘€โ“โ‰ skin ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘‘ color ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ from me (x32)
June 2021

Emoji Pasta

A woman and a redditor?

A woman and a redditor? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! eyes pop out AROOOOOOOOGA! jaw drops tongue rolls out WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF tongue bursts out of the mouth uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt * ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets BABY WANTS TO FUCK inhales from the gas tank honka honka honka honka ~masturabtes furiously ohhhh my gooooodd~
August 2021

Simps

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