[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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twitch chat
February 2016
Kripp

Viewbots

Classic

Whale and bee wrestling

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March 2021

Teamfight Tactics

response to "ok and?"

September 2021

Okay, listen up mods. I’m done with your oppressiveness

twitchquotes: Okay, listen up mods. I’m done with your oppressiveness. I try day in and day out to spam dank copy-pasta in chat and what do I get in return? Just the same old, 10 minute time out from you fun-suckers. Chat is filled with just meaningful dialogue and constructive feedback. I’m done. I’m out. And I swear to god, don’t even think about deleting this message.
twitch chat
February 2017

MODS

Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team

twitchquotes: Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team contacting you due to your expertise in the game known as League of Legends. We wanted to invite you here, to riot studios, to singlehandedly write the code for the next big patch, rebalancing the game anyway you want! we know youre a much better player, coder, and balancer of games than we are. Thank YOU T1!!!
twitch chat
April 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing