I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
I used to be a real ad
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This is the shittiest reply ever Modern Warfare version
twitchquotes:
This is the shittiest reply ever. Modern Warfare requires movement, camping, claymoring, rotating, and hitting shots. There are not βpositionsβ in Modern Warfare. A kickers job is LITERALLY to kick. Horrible analogy, kind of embarrassing.
twitch chat
I was banned for posting long paragraphs
twitchquotes:
Hi Trump I was banned for posting "long paragraphs" according to my 3rd grade english teacher a paragraph is 6 or more sentences and a long paragraph is over 9. I would like compensation for this bannerino i recieved from some of your le nazi mods. I think that this should recieve at least 420/69 points for my paper. Please no copy pasterilni linguini pleaserini.
twitch chat
Trump
I fucked the impostor from the hitgame Among Us in my dreams
I fucked the impostor from the hitgame Among Us in my dreams. He was very sus. I canβt stop thinking about his big red schlong destroying my anus until itβs as red as the impostor from the hitgame Among Us. I hope I can ever meet him. I would stroke his chest, give him a big slap on his butt that was hidden behind that hot latex astronaut suit. I want him in my ass, I want him to fill my twitching butthole with everything he got. This is how my wet dreams end every single day, I canβt stop thinking about the impostor of the hitgame Among Us.
Among Us / Amogus
You've seen Miku on stage, but what about your wrist?
Youβve π‘π¨ seen ππ€π
π» Miku on π stage, 4οΈβ£π but π what ππΌ about π₯΄ your 
wrist? βπ― Wrist βπ― World π is an AR game π― using π wristbands, now π« featuring Hatsune Miku! Collect songs, dances, and even β save π¦ the world! π Do π You ππ¦ Wrist βπ― World? π wrist βπ― world πππ
wrist? βπ― Wrist βπ― World π is an AR game π― using π wristbands, now π« featuring Hatsune Miku! Collect songs, dances, and even β save π¦ the world! π Do π You ππ¦ Wrist βπ― World? π wrist βπ― world πππ
Emoji Pasta
You can't be kicked from an Among Us game
Did you know that InnerSloth (the owner of Among Us) says that you can't actually be kicked from a game by the owner? Section 34 of their TOS states that any individual who purchases a copy of the game has a right to play the game, and cannot be prevented from playing games by any individual. If you've kicked from a game recently, or want to learn more, google "Among Us rule 34"