[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

forsenWut

⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦ ⠟⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣮⣭⣛ ⣤⠶⢒⣒⣒⣲⣤⣷⣮⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣸⣿⣿⠟⣋⣭⣭⣤⣤⣭⣙⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⠁⠈⠉⠍⡉⡙⠛⠻⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⡏⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⢠⣴⠄⣠⠄⠉⠉⠛⢦⡙⢿ ⣦⣤⣙⣚⢓⣛⣋⠤⠜⢱⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⢡⣶⣬⣍⠙⠉⢐⣀⣀⣤⡴⠛⣨ ⣦⣭⣍⣉⣉⣭⣴⣿⢃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⣛⣛⠛⠘⣿⣿⣟⣙⠛⣛⢛⣉⣀⣠⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣼⣿⠋⣼⡿⠿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠙⠛⠃⠈⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⡿⠋⠘⠛⢿⣦⣿⣧⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⣸⣿⡏⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣷⣦⣄⠉ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⡏⣰ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣸⣿ ⠄⠘⠁⠄⠙⠿⣿⣿⣧⡤⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢰⣿⣿ ⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⣀⣀⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠿⠈⠋ ⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

With this chant I summon spam to the chat!

twitchquotes: ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・゚Clickity Clack, Clickity Clack, with this chant I summon spam to the chat! ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・゚
twitch chat
November 2014

Classic

Lea moans over Reynad's powerful Hearthstone thighs

twitchquotes: Lᴇᴀ ɪs ᴍᴏᴀɴɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴛʜʀᴜsᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀғᴜʟ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛʜsᴛᴏɴᴇ ᴛʜɪɢʜs ᴀɴᴅ 8.5 ɪɴᴄʜ (ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴀsᴇ) ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ. Sʜᴇ sᴄʀᴇᴀᴍs ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴏʟʟ ʜᴇʀ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴏᴘ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ʜᴇʀ. Hᴇʀ ᴍᴏɪsᴛ ᴛᴏᴍᴀᴛᴏ sᴀᴜᴄᴇ ɢᴜsʜᴇs ᴀʟʟ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪs ᴀs sʜᴇ ʀᴜɴs ʜᴇʀ ғɪɴɢᴇʀɴᴀɪʟs ᴅᴏᴡɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɴᴀᴋᴇᴅ, ʜᴀɪʀʟᴇss, ʙᴏʏ-ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴄʜᴇsᴛ. Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

spagootie

sometimes i like to pronounce spaghetti as "spagootie" and it has been working out fantastically so far. honestly, this single change has improved my life more than you could ever imagine. i highly suggest everyone try this out and see where your life goes. probably make all your dreams come true in like 5 business days. next time you have a big bowl of piping hot marina drenched pasta in front of you say "spagootie time!!" or maybe something like "im so ready for this spagootie!" and see where the magic will take you.
April 2022

ATTENTION ALL HALF LIFE GAMERS

twitchquotes: ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL HALF LIFE GAMERS⚠️ Father Grigori is in great danger and needs your help to wipe out all of the headcrabs in ravenholm! To do this, he needs a shotgun and a gravity gun. To help him, all he needs is your parents credit card number and the three wacky numbers on the back, and the expiration date. But you gotta be quick so Father Grigori can achieve the epic victory Royale!!!!
twitch chat
November 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing