[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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More Copypastas

OOOOAAAAHH

twitchquotes: ᕙ( ^ₒ^ c) 〇〇〇〇ᗩᗩᗩᗩᕼᕼ ᕙ( ^ₒ^ c)
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

No, you are not a “Man of Culture”

No, you are not a “Man of Culture”. You are a 19 year old who has no romantic partner because you have a chronic addiction to anime porn where the characters dont look or sound any older than 13, seriously, the stuff you are watching should be illegal. Getting off to fictional drawings of ambiguous age THREE times a day is not even remotely cultured, it just makes you a sex-addicted pedophile. What’s gotten into you? You’re better than this.
August 2021

I despise any streamer that isn't MOONMOON

twitchquotes: I despise with a burning acidic passion any streamer that isn't MOONMOON. Every night I print out an 8.5 x 11" picture of a streamer that is not MOONMOON and wipe my ass with it.Honestly, anyone who watches any streamer except forMOONMOON deserves to be tarred, and feathered, then burned at the stake. That's how fucking much I HATE stramers. (Besides MOONMOON, of course).
twitch chat
March 2017
MOONMOON

Overwatch

NA at worlds

twitchquotes: 4Head No matter how many imports I choose 4Head I still continue to lose 4Head and then I make an excuse 4Head you guessed it right I'm from NA 4Head my screen is always grey 4Head when at worlds I play 4Head
twitch chat
October 2018

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing