I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
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Buff Doge
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⣤⠈⢿⣿⡿⠋⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠇⢸⣿⣷⠦⢀⣤⡚⠂⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⡾⠋⠀⢼⣥⡘⠃⣤⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⢀⣦⡄⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⣤⣄⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢠⡾⠉⠃⠀⠀⠀⠠⣤⣰⣿⡗⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠋⠀⠀⢠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠉⠙⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⡀⠤⠴⠲⣲⣿⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠄⠙⢿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿
⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠲⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸
⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸
⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈
⡟⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄
⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇
⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠑⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡟⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠾⠛⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃
⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠓⠲⠀⠠⠄⠠⠴⠟⠒⠂⢀⡈⠁⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠙⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠄⠀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡄⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠐⠂⠤⠀⠐⠀⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸
⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⣿⣿⡇⠀⠞⠁⠂⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⠠⠤⠀⠀⠀⡢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⣴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸
⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⣿⣿⡇⠀⠲⢮⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠤⠀⠄⠀⠀⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢡⠇⠰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸
⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠣⡀⢹⣿⡇⠀⠓⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠒⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠸⠇⠀⡂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾
⣿⣿⣦⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⣄⠙⠇⠸⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠖⠀⠐⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀⣀⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢠⡆⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⡋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⠿⠀⣼⡐⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⢠⢂⣿⣷⡇⢠⠀⠀⠀⡐⠀⠀⣧⣤⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⡀⢠⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⡇⠸⢄⠀⠀⡠⠊⠀⢁⣾⣿⣿⡇⠸⠣⠀⠴⠅⠀⡄⡀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⣤⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢲⣷⡄⣠⣤⣄⡀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣉⡿⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⡀⠠⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣼⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠠⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠁⠀⣀⣤⣤⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Having a daughter is the ULTIMATE SIMP
As a man who has a daughter, you are LITERALLY dedicating at least 20 years of your life simply to raise a girl for another man to enjoy. It is the ULTIMATE AND FINAL SIMP. Think about it logically.
Simps
Super Meat Boy
⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⣉⢉⣉⣉⣤⣬⣥⣤⣤⣤⣤⣬⣭⣈⣉⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⢠⣶⣶⣿⣿⢫⢷⢋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⠟⡛⠛⠳⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⡤⠀⠉⢿⣿⡇⠿⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡀⣿⣏⠈⣁⢤⣠⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠄⣸⣿⡇⠀⣾⣿⣘⠛⢿
⣿⣿⠇⣿⣧⡽⠟⣛⣛⣛⣛⠛⢛⡛⣛⣛⣛⣛⢛⡛⠿⣿⣿⣶⣷⣿⢻⣿⣇⠸
⣿⠃⣼⣿⣿⣧⡠⣍⣿⣿⣧⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣩⡅⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣾⣿⡟⢰
⠇⣼⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣭⣝⣙⣻⠻⠻⠛⠿⣟⣉⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣋⣬⣤⣾
⣇⠻⣿⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣷⣬⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⢠⣤⣤⣤⡄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣦⣉⣛⣛⠛⣛⣉⣁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⡛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣋⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Kripp's kidney stone surgery
twitchquotes:
There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
twitch chat
Kripp
When will C9 play at Worlds?
twitchquotes:
Hi guys, I'm a 12 year old from Uganda. I sold my 6 kids just to be able to afford internet to watch C9 play at worlds. When will they play?
twitch chat
Riot Games