[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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More Copypastas

Strong cringe feeling overflowing me

twitchquotes: Every time you reach out your hand to your webcam and lower your voice there is a strong cringe feeling overflowing me like a zoo lock overflows the board and there is no way I can handle it
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Seoul Dynasty is just winning because...

twitchquotes: Seoul Dynasty is just winning because they go up against easy teams. It’s boosting their win ratio. They should go up against better teams to really show how good they are. I’m not calling them bad. I just want to clarify why they seem so good, even though they’re not.
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Minion Joker

───────────▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄ ────────▄▀▀═════════════▀▀▄ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β•β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β•β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β•β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β•β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β–ˆβ–„β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–„β–ˆβ•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–Œβ•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β–β–“β–“β–Œ β”€β”€β”€β–β–β–“β–“β–Œβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–β–“β–“β–Œβ–Œ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–β–“β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–“β–Œβ•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–Œβ•β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ•β–β•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ•β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ•β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ•β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ•β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ•β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ•β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆ β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆ β”€β–„β–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβ–„ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ ─────────▀▀▀▀────────▀▀▀▀
September 2021

Kripp and the Hardcore Police

twitchquotes: ΰΌΌ β–€ΜΏΜΏΔΉΜ―ΜΏΜΏβ–€ΜΏ ΜΏ ΰΌ½ Kripp, this is the hardcore police, it has come to our attention that you RIP in peace above the allowed average hardcore limit. We are here to inform you that your channel prefix must be changed into cl (casual-life) as a repercussion to better represent your current lifestyle. This will be the last warning. ΰΌΌ β–€ΜΏΜΏΔΉΜ―ΜΏΜΏβ–€ΜΏ ΜΏ ΰΌ½ ᴊ
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

I want to come. Not on your face

twitchquotes: I want to come. Not on your face. Not on your titties. I want to come over whenever you need me. Those late nights when you have too much on your mind. Or you have nothing on your mind. I’ll be there, whenever you need me.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

Text-to-Speech Playing