I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices
twitchquotes:
Twitch Chat (βChatβ) respectfully submits this memorandum of law in support of its motion to enjoin Octavian Morosan (βnl_Krippβ) from distributing false and deceptive advertising for his stream. The "nl" of Mr. Morosan's streaming identity refers to "no life." This is a blatantly deceptive and demonstrably false claim as it can be qualitatively determined that Mr. Morosan does indeed have a life. The Lanham Act merits an injunction preventing Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices.
twitch chat
Kripp
bri'ish accent
stabbed: Oit there mate, bit rude to put that knoife in me chest innit?
chewsday: It's chewsday innit?
BLM: Black lives ma-a
spiderman: peta paka
ffs: fuh funk saek
ROIGHT wots oll dis den
Covid-19: Cowvid Nointeen
fuck you: funk yew
sub to youtube: subscribe to my youchube
you look beautyfull: yu luuk beutiful loaf
you gotta be jk: yoove gOHt to be joe king
math is hard: mafffmatic is hard, innit!?
i saw a film: I soar a film
not botherd: I'm not movered
harry potter: arry pah uh
my son is now foh yes old
nice art: Roight, look aat thi meauchiful bloody wohk of aaaht
mtdew: mointain jew
Infinite Cum Part 3
Your release had increased so much that they could no longer contain you. Your cum has consumed the entirety of the cosmos. Humanity is without a shred of doubt, gone.
You are alone in the universe.
If there were aliens, they are dead now.
Itβs over.
In despair, you mourn the death of the scientists, of humanity, of everyone. You realize you'll never hear her sweet and calming voice, see her proud body.
Your sad. Your terrified. Chronicles pass. The last stars in the universe eclipse. You silently watch as the last atoms break into protons, into quarks, into mere beams of weak energy that disperse along the vertical ropes. But the ropes no longer play their docile music. They have gonne silent.
You watch, helplessly, as the Last mozon is engulfed into the ever expanding plane of Cum. Your own creation destroys the very own universe, defying the own plan of existence.
You are alone.
You scream, but nothing comes out of your mouth. You cry, but nothing descends from your eyes. Do you even have eyes? All you can see is the torrid Instotucional white across the whole of the Universe. Entire Gans eclipse before your eyes, but then you realize the horror: The Cum turned against you.
With nothing more to consume, your sons turned against their father, and begin to consume you. You tremble. There's nothing to do. The huge weight impacts you like if whole planets fell onto your shoulders. Your alone. In your last moments, a odd sentiment of peace invades you for the first time since the early days of the universe. It's finally gonna end. You think about all the people that you've met during your stay in this universe. In the end, you think about the researcher. About her arms. Her breasts. You feel... good. For the first time in many hipereons. You jack off it.
It's so.... good, you come at the right time, freeing the constrained cum from your menber. You open your eyes, and behold the bathroom door.
You are Ok. You remember everything. It's all over.
You exit the bathroom after jacking off again, going back to your old life.
The cum stops.
Infinite Cum
If Morbius has a million fans, I am one of them
Moon emoji blob
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