[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Football

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⡀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣷⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠈⠻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠻⡦⠈⠻⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡉⠻⠂⡀⠺⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣧⡈⠋⣠⡈⢻⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⡟⠻⡦⠈⠠⣦⣈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠺⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣦⡀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⢿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠈⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
October 2021

Sneaky can you take me on a date?

twitchquotes: Sneaky this has been on my mind for a long time and i just don't know how to articulate it into words but i'll try. Your cosplays really turn me on and i was wondering if you would take a fellow furry on a date some time (you can even beat me if i'm naughty ;)) I think we would just really hit it off and i would really enjoy licking your cute little cheeks xD. I would love to recieve your seed and nut so we can produce some hybrid furry/cosplaying babies. It would really change my whole life ^_^
twitch chat
May 2019
Sneaky

Hello gentleman, I have suffered a loss of 69K

Hello gentleman, I regretfully wish to share with you all that I shant comment on this Internet forum henceforth. As of the time of my arrival in this past autumn, I have suffered a loss of 69K. By the blessing of Lady Luck, I am still experiencing a positive net balance of 420%, so I have come to the conclusion I must liquidate my insignificant phallus account. I shall use this fortune for procuring a vaginal enlargement and acquire tremendous breasts for my OnlyAristocracy parchment. Or I may be devilish and maintain an investment position in TournamentCease. I am short of hours of leisure in life, training dogs to consume peanut butter from the reaches of my posterior and can not bare the rapid change of value of my investment holdings of 40 point 7 grand. I am aware that you, my peers of this financial derivatives Internet forum are filled with ecstasy to become privy to this, so copulate with yourself, I desire you all to be ablaze in nonheteronormative ursine hell in tandem with Sadam.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

xqcRage

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⠊⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠂⠸⣿⠿⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢡⣤⣤⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠁⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠐⠒⠚⠛⠛⠻⠇⠀⠀ ⣉⣁⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣷⣶⡀⠀⢀⣤⢤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢤⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠂⠀⠒⠻⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠙⡉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⠤⠤⣤⣀⣀⣀⠀⠉⠙⠛⢿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢉⣿⢶⣤⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣶⣶⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠀⠸⠧⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⢀⠀⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣈⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠘⠛⠋⣩⣭⣬⣠⣬⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢠⣦⣤⣄⣀⢀⣠⣤⡀⡴⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
December 2020
xQcOW

FrankerZ

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November 2014
Text-to-Speech Playing