I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Twitch Chat Examination Team
twitchquotes:
Hello this is the Twitch Chat Examination Team here with anther experiment. We are testing how quickly a message typed into chat is copied and pasted by the mindless hordes. Please, if you're reading this, spread awareness for our cause.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
"Unsponsored Hero Academy 2™ Stream
twitchquotes:
It is the 2018 Oscars and Tom Hanks stands at the podium to announce Best Actor. “Boy,” he says, “we got a real competition this year! Johnny Depp, Leo DiCaprio, George Clooney, anyone could win!” The world holds its breath to see who will win the most prestigious acting award in the world. “Wow!” says Hanks. “I don’t believe it! The winner is Kripparrian in his ‘Unsponsored’ Hero Academy 2™ Stream!”
twitch chat
FeelsStrongMan
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠁⠈⠉⠙⠻⢿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠠⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⠪⡖⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠶⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢔⡢⠍⠉⠉⠩⠭⢑⣤⣔⠲⠤⠭⠭⠤⠴⢊⡻⣿
⡿⠁⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⣤⠭⠓⠊⣁⣤⠂⠠⢀⡈⠱⣶⣆⣠⣴⡖⠁⠂⣀⠈⢷⣮⣹
⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⢳⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣿⡿⢿⣿⣇⣀⣥⣤⠤⢼⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡟⠑⠚⢹⡟⠉⣑⠒⢺⡇⡀⠀⡹⠀⠀⣀⣴⣽⣿⣿
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣘⡄⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⢱⢸⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⠀⠾⣟⣻⣛⠷⣶⣼⣥⣀⣀⣀⠀⢧⠀⠀⠀⠠⣧⣀⣼⣴⢽⣿
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Pepe
Fairy tale of Reynard and Lea
twitchquotes:
Let me tell you the fairy tale of Reynard and Lea. Once there was a magical salt-shaker named Reynard. He lived in a magical kitchen where the princess Lea would make sandwiches. One day Lea shook Reynard too hard and he broke, spilling salt everywhere. 
twitch chat
Reynad
Hot Twitch streamers are just not good for my health
Her streams are just not good for my health. She is so hot I skip every stage and go straight to post nut clarity, then I get a deep feeling of loneliness and dread. I just don't know what to do with myself and everything seems pointless.