[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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HELP!!! If you're reading this...

twitchquotes: HELP!!! If you're reading this you're the only person in chat that isn't a prerecorded and scripted person yet. Get out before you become...one as we-... Dank Memes
twitch chat
June 2015
TidesOfTime

me preds egg rolls

twitchquotes: last week i was out really late walking through a dark alley and out of nowhere i hear "me preds" then a small asian boy wearing a kakashi cosplay came out of nowhere screaming "me preds" over and over telling me to sell my kogmaws and reksais. The same guy got me again today but this time he was saying something about egg rolls .
twitch chat
December 2019

Teamfight Tactics

I want to bang the Minecraft Ender Dragon

March 2021

NSFW

I can no longer resist the pizza

twitchquotes: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kripp the Grinch

twitchquotes: Some call him the Grinch... but we call him Kripp he won't bring you gifts or candy for Christmas but will give you a carrot, some lettuce and some cabbage because he does not want you to have fun on Christmas... just Healthy. He will sneak into your house and give you those lovely vegan treats and then sneak off into the night to complain and moan about RNG......
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp
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