[Copypasta] You fool. The statement "It's opposite day" is paradoxical by nature.

You fool. You imbecile. You absolute buffoon. You cannot simply say "I'm gay! It's Opposite Day btw". The statement "It's Opposite Day" is paradoxical by nature. With the logic that everything said during Opposite Day is untrue, saying "It's Opposite Day" on Opposite Day negates that statement. Because the statement "It's Opposite Day" is now untrue, it is no longer Opposite Day and therefore your original remark is now correct. That means it IS opposite day, and a neverending cycle that is known as The Liar's Paradox is created. You were a complete idiot not to invoke the conditional clause. For example, if you were to say, "If it were opposite day, I'd be gay!" your statement would not be holed. You have been snared within a web of your own making. Listen to the sky crack and fall. The universe will implode on itself and it's your own fault.
September 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021

The default Fortnite dance is truly a masterpiece

twitchquotes: The default dance is truly a masterpiece. Never, in all of history, has such an artistic masterpiece ever been created. The choreography is possibly the most beautiful sight ever beheld by the human eye. The sharp sound of the SLAP when the player’s hands collide perfectly with the beat of the song sends a bone chilling shiver down my spine, every single time I hear it. I find my self watching my in-game avatar performing this phenomenal dance ritual for hours on end.
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Fortnite

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August 2021

Puts on sunglasses

Sounds to me like... ( •_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ [punch line] (⌐■_■)
October 2021

Tesla is restarting production today

twitchquotes: Tesla is restarting production today against Alameda County rules. I will be on the line with everyone else. If anyone is arrested, I ask that it only be me.
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May 2020
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