[Copypasta] My best friend is racist

So I met him today and asked him: "Hello, my best friend, are you racist?" And he replied with: "Yes, I'm racist" I was shocked. So I asked him back: "You racist?" He said: "Yes, I'm actually racist" To comprehend him, I asked: "Why are you racist?" He answered with: "Because I'm racist" I made sure: "Racism?" He replied: "Yeah, racism" I shout out: "Oh no" He just: "Yeah" And I'm just: "That's so racist" He: "Racism"
October 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Timed out for 525 seconds for typing hahaha

twitchquotes: I got timed out for 525 seconds for typing hahaha, In this time I realized that twitch originated from Nazi Germany and thus I grew the most manly pubic hair in my entire life and ate it to sooth my pains. Please no copy seig heil pasta
twitch chat
December 2014
strifecro

we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce

gf is prego we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital she's still bleeding everywhere by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything he takes one look at ther and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do" "WHY THE FUCK NOT???" "we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
February 2021

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Dunning-Kruger effect

twitchquotes: The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias wherein unskilled individuals suffer from illusory superiority, mistakenly assessing their ability to be much higher than is accurate. This bias is attributed to a metacognitive inability of the unskilled to recognize their ineptitude.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Anime girl 2

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–„ β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–€ β–β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–ˆβ–€β–Œβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–’β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘
October 2016

Weebs

A girl... AND a gamer?

A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~
March 2021

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Text-to-Speech Playing