[Copypasta] I just shit and cum FAQ (Reddit)

I just shit and cum. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of shit (and cum) on my computer and floor has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of feces or ejaculation. These include, but are not limited to: * Being gay * Dank copypasta bro, where'd you find it * walter ## Am I going to shit and cum too? No - not yet. But you should refrain from shitposting and cumposting like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to shit and cum again, which may put your shitting and cumming privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved being shit and cum at. Can you un-cum it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put shit back into my butt. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a hot load explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to retaliatory ejaculation within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of semen dies before it can fertilize the egg, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the goopy brown and white substance and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated in my mom's basement. I will continue to shit and cum until you improve your conduct. Remember: ejaculation is privilege, not a right.
November 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Making poops of different shapes

twitchquotes: Sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴡʜᴇɴ I ᴘᴏᴏᴘ, I ᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sʜᴀᴘɪɴɢ ᴀᴛᴛᴀᴄʜᴍᴇɴᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴍʏ ᴏʟᴅ Pʟᴀʏ Dᴏʜ ғᴜɴ sᴇᴛ. I ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇ ɪᴛ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ᴀɴᴜs, ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴘᴏᴏᴘs ɪɴ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ sʜᴀᴘᴇs. Tʜᴇʀᴇ's ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴀᴛ ᴀʟʟ. I'ᴍ ᴀɴ Aᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀɴ, ʟɪᴠɪɴɢ ɪɴ Aᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀ, ᴀɴᴅ ɪғ I ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴘᴏᴏᴘs sʜᴀᴘᴇᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ sᴛᴀʀs, I ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴛᴏ. Tʜᴇ ғᴏᴜɴᴅɪɴɢ ғᴀᴛʜᴇʀs ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ɪᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀʏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

You have been hand picked to be recruited by the FBI

twitchquotes: Hey YOU. Yes YOU! You are the only one who can see this message. You have been hand picked to be recruited by the FBI. But in order to hire you we need to know that you are on your alert, even if it comes to text in a chat box. Please copy and paste this so we know that you have seen it. Good luck and God Bless.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Can you guys stop typing 'misplay'?

twitchquotes: Can you guys stop typing 'misplay'? We know Kripp is not the best player and he might be a bit slow in the head, but stop pointing out the obvious by typing 'misplay' over and over.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

bears are fuk

I hate people saying bears are fuk or bulls are fuk. Stop saying that. It's very rude. Just say bears are fuk
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Laughing crying

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠋⣉⣉⣉⣉⣉⣉⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⢁⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡈⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢻⣿ ⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⡀⣿ ⡇⢸⣿⣿⠋⣠⡾⠿⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠻⢷⣄⠙⣿⣿⡇⢸ ⡇⢸⣿⣿⣾⣿⢀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⣿⣷⣾⣿⡇⢸ ⡇⠸⠟⣫⣥⣶⣧⠹⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠏⣼⣶⣬⣍⠻⠇⢸ ⡧⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢰⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢼ ⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠈⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠋⠁⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸ ⣿⣌⡻⠿⠿⢋⣴⣦⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⢀⣴⣦⡙⠿⠿⢟⣡⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⡀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⡿⠋⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣉⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣌⣉⣉⣉⣉⣉⣉⣡⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing