I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot. My earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen anyone in the near vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or will ever produce, shot out so hard that it ripped my dick apart by my ΓΌbernut accelerating to 7% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused my building to collapse, and every female in the city to fall pregnant with my children. As I lay dying under the rubble, I rest assured knowing every one of my sons will repeat this glorious act.
I used to be a real ad
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V for Vendatta
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This message adds zero value to your life. I hope you enjoyed reading this, because I enjoyed typing it out. If you are still reading this, I would just like to tell you that you are wasting your time. If you think anything positive will come out of this final sentence, you are mistaken
twitch chat
Kripp
I(21M) am convinced that my(20F) wife's pet rabbit thinks my wife is his mate, it is ruining our marriage
It all started when I was dating my wife. I met her four years ago and we have been dating all 4 years. She has had the rabbit since before I met her.
The little bastard is old and saggy and partially blind. Some parts of his body is missing patches of fur because he pulls it out to make a nest for himself and my wife.
When we met the rabbit was not a major issue. It would scratch and bite at me but my wife assured me he was just nervous to have another person in her apartment as my wife and the rabbit lived alone since my wife was 18.
We have been married one year now and the rabbit is wreaking havoc on our marriage but my wife refuses to do anything because to her the rabbit is her baby and she loves it more than anything.
When I first moved in the rabbit did not do much to me or us other than the previously mentioned bites and scratches but he shows my wife too much affection for just a owner.
We will be doing anything and she will have the rabbit with her on top of her chest on her breasts licking them and her face. She will not put it down at all whenever she is home with it. We eat dinner, he is there, she goes to the bathroom, he comes with, she is showering? He waits outside for her, watching her nude in the shower. Wife does not even let me in the bathroom with her.
It has gone to the point where whenever I show my wife affection the rabbit seeks revenge on me. Sometimes not immediately but at times he does attack me on the spot when I kiss my wife. Sometimes I find little tiny brown balls, his shit in my closet.
Another thing is that she lets the little shit roam free all day but nighttime and when we are making love. This was not previously the case but after an accident during lovemaking and much long conversations I convinced my wife to put the rabbit in its cage when we are making love.
But now whenever I am making love to my wife, like clockwork, the little shit knows what we are doing and screams at the top of its lungs until my wife abandons what she is doing, even nude and comes to the smug little shits rescue. He is doing this out of pure spite.
I am aware that rabbits only scream when very stressed or in danger but he is in his huge cage because my wife spoils him only during night and when we make love, I swear he is doing this to ruin our marriage. He thinks my wife is his mate and wants to get rid of me.
I have scars all over my body from bites and scratches and my life refuses to do anything about the rabbit or how much time she spends with it.
We are in couples therapy and our marriage is very rocky. What do I do?
President's Day Emoji Pasta
ITS PRESIDENTS DAY SLUTS!! π¨π¨πΊπΈπΊπΈπΊπΈπΊπΈtime to hop onto that founding father dickππππ΄π»π΄π»π΄π»π΄π»or should i say founding DADDIES!!!π©π©π©πππ
π
π¦π¦ out here tryna get rammed from behind ππππharder than the rock of MOUNT RUSHMOREβοΈβοΈβ°ππgeorge washington mightve been able to survive the harsh βοΈβοΈπ¬wintersπ¬βοΈβοΈ of valley forge, but can he handle the conditions between the sheetsπͺπβββbe the monica Lewinsky ππ»to my bill clintonπββοΈ baby and i wont deny i had ππβοΈsexual relationsβοΈππ with you!!! crack the whip down harder on your bae than ronald Reagan did on welfare programsπΈπΈπ€·πΌββοΈπ€·πΌββοΈπ€·πΌββοΈβπ»send this to FIVE of your baddest presidential PRINCESSESπΈπΌπΊπΈπΊπΈπΈπΌwho will throw the nastiest neckπππ©π©πππ¬π¦ on this AMERICAN BEAUT OF A DAYππππ¨β€οΈ if you get 10 back, be prepared for the president to enter the oval office of you PUSSY tonightπ±π±π¦π¦ππ©π©π©π©π©πΊπΈπΊπΈπΊπΈ