[Copypasta] Salty tofu

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, its Freddy Fappaccino here from the Canadian Investment Department we are in contact with Eddy Pasterino the proclaimed p**n director and would like to know if your intrested in our new p**n venture called "Salty tofu" where you will come in and pour your salt all over hafu morrison's face.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

PJSalt = Hs²

twitchquotes: Albert Einstein was desperate. He tried to prove that the luck of Kripp's opponents was within the laws of mathematics. Critics laughed claiming bad luck is divine punishment for embracing casualness. On his deathbed, he spent his last seconds jotting down the most famous formulas, PJSalt = Hs²
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Diablo 2 is a top down shooter from the 1800s

twitchquotes: Hi Octavian, I've been watching your stream for some days now and I really enjoy it! Actually no, I hate it. You think you're always right when you play that cardgame and now you're playing some topdown shooter from the 1800's, dude grow up. Kid ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp I am a young beautiful Korean girl

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴀ ʏᴏᴜɴɢ ʙᴇᴀᴜᴛɪғᴜʟ ᴋᴏʀᴇᴀɴ ɢɪʀʟ (>‿◠)✌ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ɢɪɢɢʟᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏsᴇʟғ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴏғ ʜᴏᴡ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀᴛ ɢᴀᴍᴇs ♡‿‿♡ ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴍᴇ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Dear Kripp, I own the apple orchard outside Toronto

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I own the apple orchard outside Toronto and I am begging you to stop drinking so much OJ. Since you became popular on the Twitch our sales have decreased by over 69% because Canadians want to be like you. For *** sake please drink some apple juice! If you continue drinking OJ, I wont be able to feed my family anymore
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

When Kripp plays Reno warrior...

twitchquotes: Captain's log, entry 69, stardate 420. It has been 9001 days since the SS Kripp first entered into this game of hearthstone, and still there appears to be no signs of release, no way out. I fear for the lives of myself and my crew, we may all pass of old age before we are freed from this particular game.
twitch chat
November 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing