[Copypasta] Salty tofu

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, its Freddy Fappaccino here from the Canadian Investment Department we are in contact with Eddy Pasterino the proclaimed p**n director and would like to know if your intrested in our new p**n venture called "Salty tofu" where you will come in and pour your salt all over hafu morrison's face.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

Leifgirl, the Leifman's sister

twitchquotes: Stop it, guys. I'm Leifman's sister, and mother of our beautiful little daughter, Leifgirl. The spam and constant harassment in this chat is driving my beloved Leifman insane. Since he became moderator, he's spending all his time here, and can't provide for his family, anymore. Please, Leifman, get back to work in our salt plant, we need the money.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Sorry I dropped my bag of doritos

twitchquotes: ▼ ◄▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ ◄ ▲ ► ▼ sorry I dropped my bag of doritos
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

That's not his knee

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) that's not his knee ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

The unluckiest human ever

twitchquotes: BREAKING NEWS - Canadian scientists have discovered what they are calling "the unluckiest human ever". The unfortunate individual, a scraggly, foul-smelling, unkempt Canadian man, discovered this condition by badly playing a digital children's card game. "It's literally unbelievable, dude", the man told scientists. "I play every game perfectly, but my opponents just keep topdecking me!" The man continued to whine incessantly until, unfortunately, he dropped dead of a salt overdose.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Hey dad, you never answered any of my calls all day

twitchquotes: Hey dad, you never answered any of my calls all day. Still waiting for you to pick up me and Cattarian from the "Foster Care" fun park that you left us at a few months ago. Tell Motherania that we miss her too. If you dont pick us up soon we'll be forced to work in the salt mines. Love, Kripp Jr
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing