[Copypasta] Salty tofu

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, its Freddy Fappaccino here from the Canadian Investment Department we are in contact with Eddy Pasterino the proclaimed p**n director and would like to know if your intrested in our new p**n venture called "Salty tofu" where you will come in and pour your salt all over hafu morrison's face.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

MALDHAWK

twitchquotes: Late last year, we were on an expedition to find the rarest hairstyle of them all.. the "MALDHAWK" A combination of MALD and a hawk nest, it combines the fluidity of middle aged male pattern baldness to a contrast of dead rats. Much to our chagrin, we found it April 13th, 2020, on a morose Canadian gypsy's stream. He had over 10k viewers at the time of writing this
twitch chat
April 2020
Kripp

Mad Bomber Diary

twitchquotes: Mad Bomber Diary 11/11/14: Dear Diary, Kripp has played me 200th time today, he always keeps me for his greediest plays like I'm one of his prosterinos. I shall take this torment no more, I demand that he coins me out on an empty board like an honest minion from now on. Pls no copy pasterino my story
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I want to become a hearth

twitchquotes: I want to become a hearth. I know there’re people out there just like me, but I’m different. On November 14th, I’m moving to Jamestown; home of the hearths. I’ve cut off my arms, and now light myself on fire everywhere I go as training. I'm not be a hearth yet, but if you give me a chance, I will become the greatest hearth.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Kripp should change his name to hl_kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Liferino, CEO of No Life Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has life) as you no longer are a "no life". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Look guys the rules are pretty simple

twitchquotes: Look guys the rules are pretty simple. You are allowed to copypasta and participate in it, but if you are the only one copy pasting it over and over it is time to stop and think about your life and come up with something better to do
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing