[Copypasta] My donger is half my age

twitchquotes: ◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕ ɪ ᴍ**ᴛᴜʀʙᴀᴛᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ɴɪᴠᴇᴀ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴍ ɴᴏᴡ ᴍʏ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ ɪs ʜᴀʟғ ᴍʏ ᴀɢᴇ ͡◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

I am contacting you as a representative of the NSA

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Octavian Morosan. I am contacting you as a representative of the NSA. Recent reports say that you are playing a children's card game and spilling PJSalt everywhere. The PJSalt is clogging our network and blocking our abilities to spy on you and the rest of Canadaland. I am going to have to ask you to stop the salt as it is a threat to national security. Please don't copy paste this official document. This is serious.
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

salty

Salt season pass

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no PJSalt
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Wagner Opera Topdeckhoffen

twitchquotes: Gᴜᴛᴇɴ Tᴀɢ, Hᴇʀʀ Kʀɪᴘᴘ! Mᴇɪɴ Nᴀᴍᴇ ɪsᴛ Pᴇᴛᴇʀ ᴠᴏɴ Pᴀsᴛᴇɴʜᴏғғᴇɴ. Hᴇʀᴇ ɪɴ Dᴇᴜᴛsᴄʜʟᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ ɴᴇᴡ Wᴀɢɴᴇʀ ᴏᴘᴇʀᴀ Tᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋʜᴏғғᴇɴ. Rᴀɴɪᴀ ɪs Vᴀʟᴋʏʀɪɴᴏ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴋɪʟʟs ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ʀᴇᴠᴇɴɢᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴅᴀs Pᴏʀɴʜᴜʙ. Tʀᴜᴍᴘ ᴘᴏᴜʀs Oʀᴀɴɢᴇɴsᴀғᴛ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢʀᴀᴠᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀ ɪɴ sᴋʏ ᴀs ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟ ɢʜᴏsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ. Pʟᴢ ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘᴘᴇɴ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇɴ ᴅᴏᴏɢᴇɴ ᴅᴀᴀɢᴇɴ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Kripp and Trump

twitchquotes: Aʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡᴀs ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ʜɪs ʜᴇᴛᴇʀᴏsᴇxᴜᴀʟ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ. Nᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴜʏs ᴇxᴘᴏsᴇᴅ ʜɪᴍ, ʜᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ ғᴇᴇʟs? I ʙᴇᴛ ʜᴇ's ᴘʀᴇᴛᴛʏ ᴅᴇᴠᴀsᴛᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ ғᴏᴜɴᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴇɴᴛ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ʜɪs ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴀʏ.Yᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴀʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴀsʜᴀᴍᴇᴅ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟᴠᴇs.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Or I will be forced to call the 0-3 Police

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparrian, this is Reginald. It has come to my attention that you went 0-3 in Hearthstone arena. This is completely unacceptable and detrimental to the image of Team Solo Mid. Remove any and all affiliation with TSM and "BayLife" or I will be forced to call the 0-3 Police.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing