What if we all send the same message?

twitchquotes: :thinking: what if we all send the same message? :thinking:
twitch chat
September 2016

CATTARIAN WAS A SLOW AND DELICIOUS DINNER

twitchquotes: ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°) CATTARIAN WAS A SLOW AND DELICIOUS DINNER ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Kripp forgot about shredder placement

twitchquotes: Pupparrian scampers excitedly as Kripp carries the new bird cage. "Here you go, Birdarrian," says Kripp as he hangs the cage in the office. Unfortunately, Pupparian's joyful romping caused kripp to stumble, the cage bursting open and Birdarrian falling helplessly into the merciless jaws of the paper shredder sitting below the cage. "Oh no," gasps Kripp, "I forgot about shredder placement!"
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

My name is Van, I'm an artist

twitchquotes: My name is Van, I'm an artist, I'm a performance artist. I'm hired to people to fulfill their fantasies, their deep dark fantasies. I was gonna be a movie star y'know, modeling and acting. After a hundred and two additions and small parts I decided y'know I had enough, Then I got in to Escort world. The client requests contain a lot of fetishes, so I just decided to go y'know... full ♂Master♂ and change my entire house into a dungeon... ♂Dungeon♂Master♂ now with a full dungeon in my house and It's going really well. Fisting is 300 bucks and usually the guy is pretty much hard on pop to get really relaxed y'know and I have this long latex glove that goes all the way up to my armpit and then I put on a surgical latex glove up to my wrist and just lube it up and it's a long process y'know to get your whole arm up there but it's an intense feeling for the other person I think for myself too, you go in places that even though it's physical with your hand but for some reason it's also more emotional it's more psychological too and we both get you know to the same place it's really strange at the same time and I find sessions like that really exhausting. I don't know I feel kinda naked because I am looking at myself for the first time, well not myself but this aspect of my life for the first time and it's been harsh... three to five years already? I never thought about it... Kinda sad I feel kinda sad right now, I don't know why
twitch chat
August 2019

Response to "who asked?"

I don't care if you "didn't ask". The world does not revolve around you and I can say whatever the fuck I want, and I could not care less if you didn't ask so shut the fuck up. This is why you are lonely and everyone leaves you.
August 2021

Who Asked?

Kripp Jong Un

twitchquotes: ໒( •̀ ╭ ͟ʖ╮ •́ )७ It is me Kripp Jong Un. I demand that all showings of "Topdecking and Wrecking 3: Gripped and Kripped" be removed immediately. Those who refuse will be pepperonied ໒( •̀ ╭ ͟ʖ╮ •́ )७
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Chinese characters wave

twitchquotes: 厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下厂下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦上二本与半卉一十士廿卞广下广卞廿士十一卉半与本二上旦
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

Scary mask

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠣⡑⡕⡱⡸⡀⡢⡂⢨⠀⡌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡕⢅⠕⢘⢜⠰⣱⢱⢱⢕⢵⠰⡱⡱⢘⡄⡎⠌⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡸⡸⡨⢸⢸⢈⢮⡪⣣⣣⡣⡇⣫⡺⡸⡜⡎⡢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⢱⠵⢹⢸⢼⡐⡵⣝⢮⢖⢯⡪⡲⡝⠕⣝⢮⢪⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠂⡮⠁⠐⠀⡀⡀⠑⢝⢮⣳⣫⢳⡙⠐⠀⡠⡀⠀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠣⠐⠀ ⭕  ⠀⠀⢪⢺⣪⢣⠀⡀ ⭕ .⠈⡈⠀⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⡝⣕⢄⡀⠑⢙⠉⠁⡠⡣⢯⡪⣇⢇⢀⠀⠡⠁⠁⡠⡢⠡⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢑⢕⢧⣣⢐⡄⣄⡍⡎⡮⣳⢽⡸⡸⡊⣧⣢⠀⣕⠜⡌⠌⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠌⡪⡪⠳⣝⢞⡆⡇⡣⡯⣞⢜⡜⡄⡧⡗⡇⠣⡃⡂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⢊⢜⢜⣝⣪⢪⠌⢩⢪⢃⢱⣱⢹⢪⢪⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠡⡑⠜⢎⢗⢕⢘⢜⢜⢜⠜⠕⠡⠡⡈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⡢⢀⠈⠨⣂⡐⢅⢕⢐⠁⠡⠡⢁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⠢⠀⡀⡐⡍⢪⢘⠀⠀⠡⡑⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⢂⠀⠌⠘⢜⠘⠀⢌⠰⡈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢑⢸⢌⢖⢠⢀⠪⡂
November 2018

This message is protected by a special font

twitchquotes: TᕼIᔕ ᗰᕮᔕᔕᗩGᕮ Iᔕ ᑭᖇOTᕮᑕTᕮᗪ ᗷY ᗩ ᔕᑭᕮᑕIᗩᒪ ᖴOᑎT. IT'ᔕ IᗰᑭOᔕᔕIᗷᒪᕮ TO ᑕOᑭY IT.
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear, "I just had the most awful dream, I was about to be tucked by Kibler!" Trump's bear replies, "That wasn't a dream." As Trump recoils in horror, Kibler smirks, "It seems I'm about to tuck Frump."
twitch chat
June 2015
Trump

Hank Hill

⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣀⠤⠤⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢾⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣸⣦⣀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣾⡟⠋⢉⡉⠁⡟⢿⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢂⣠⡾⣿⠋⠉⠁⢠⣦⢄⠀⠈⣿⠀⠀⣿⡇⢴⡻⣷⡢⣧⢸⣷ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⣿⡀⠀⢞⣁⣛⠤⠃⠀⣿⠀⠀⢸⣷⣀⣸⣖⣀⣸⣿⡿ ⢠⡟⠋⠻⠿⠟⠀⠀⠀⢿⣧⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⡤⠶⠟⠀⠀⠀⠻⡉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠈⣷ ⢸⣄⠈⢹⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠙⠢⢄⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⠀⠹⣦⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢏⡤⢤⣀⣀⡠⠏⠀⠀⠐⢲⡇ ⠀⠀⠘⣷⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠤⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⢸⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣊⣯⣽⣵⣷⡇⠀⠀⠀⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⣇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡀⠀⠹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠉⠠⠒⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠀⠱⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠏ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠴⠀⡏
August 2020

PepeRip

⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣉⣉⣉⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠹⠟⣡⣶⡿⢟⣛⣛⡻⢿⣦⣩⣤⣤⣤⣬⡉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢀⢤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⢮⡃⣛⣛⡻⠿⢿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⢡⣴⣯⣿⣿⣿⣉⠤⣤⣭⣶⣶⣶⣮⣔⡈⠛⠛⠛⢓⠦⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠏⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡪⢛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣶⣮⣄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⡭⠴⣶⣶⣽⣽⣛⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⣛⢛⡛⢋⣥⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⠱⣿⣿⣛⠾⣭⣛⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠑⠽⡻⢿⣿⣮⣽⣷⣶⣯⣽⣳⠮⣽⣟⣲⠯⢭⣿⣛⣛⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠈⠑⠊⠉⠟⣻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣭⣿⣛⠷⠶⠶⠂⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠙⠒⠙⠯⠍⠙⢉⣉⣡⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2019

Pepe

Circle game got'em v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠻⢶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣠⣴⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⠶⠟⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⠾⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡶⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⠞⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⠶⠶⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣄⣀⣀⣤⡴⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣟⠉⠙⢷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣷⡀⠀⠹⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡀⠀⠈⠛⣷⣤⣴⠶⠟⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⠟⠛⣻⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⡾⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠟⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⡿⠁⢀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠏⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⢫⣿⠁⠀⣼⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠃⠀⠀⢀⣴⠟⢡⡟⣿⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠟⠁⠀⠀⣰⠟⠁⢠⡿⠀⢿⡄⢰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠏⠀⠀⢠⣾⠋⠀⢀⡿⠁⠀⠈⠛⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⣴⢿⡟⠀⠀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⣄⣾⠋⠘⣧⡀⢰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
August 2021

You have been gifted FREE COCK

twitchquotes: —————————————————————— TwitchVotes You have been gifted FREE COCK. Type YEP to activate now. ——————————————————————
twitch chat
February 2021

You notice a wall of text in twitch chat

twitchquotes: You notice a wall of text in twitch chat and your hand instinctively goes to the mouse. You scroll up to stop the chat elevator and read the pasta, indulging in its delights... You soon realize that this pasta conveys no information nor is particularly witty or funny. Nevertheless, you drag your mouse across, hit Ctrl+C, then Ctrl+V and press Enter
twitch chat
March 2016

Classic

Comedy God has entered the building: Attack Helicopter

I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter WEE WOO WEE WOO ALERT! COMEDY GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! GET TO COVER! steps on stage Bystander: "Oh god! Don't do it! I have a family!" Comedy God: "Heh..." adjusts fedora the building is filled with fear and anticipation God and Jesus himself looks on in suspense comedy god clears throat everything is completely quiet not a single sound is heard world leaders look and wait with dread everything in the world stops nothing is happening comedy god smirks no one is prepared for what is going to happen comedy god musters all of this power he bellows out to the world "ATTACK" absolute suspense everyone is filled with overwhelming dread "HELICOPTER" all at once, absolute pandemonium commences all nuclear powers launch their nukes at once giant brawls start 43 wars are declared simultaneously a shockwave travels around the earth earth is driven into chaos humanity is regressed back to the stone age the pure funny of that joke destroyed civilization itself all the while people are laughing harder than they ever did people who aren't killed die from laughter literally the funniest joke in the world then the comedy god himself posts his creation to reddit and gets karma
August 2021

Classic

PagChomp

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣯⣥⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠻⠿⠟⠉⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣡⣼⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣟⣭⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⡀⢀⣩⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⡛⠛⠛⠛⢋⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⠛⠛⠓⠠⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣦⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣥⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣜⡻⠋⠀⠀⠀ ⣰⣾⣷⣶⣿⣾⣖⣻⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⢉⡽⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡤⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠛⢶⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠃⠀⠀⠀⠈⠲⣴⣦⣤⣤⣤⣶⡾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠄⠈⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020

DansGame

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░▄█████████████▄░░ ▄████████▀▀▄▄▄▄▄▄█ ███████▀▄█▀▀▀░░░░░▀▄ █████▀▄█▀░░░░░░░░░░▀ ███▀▄█▀▒▒▒▒▒░░░░▄▄▀░▓ ██▀▄█▓▄▄▄▄▄▒▒▒░░▒▄▄░░ ██▓█▀▓▀▄▄▄▒▒██▒░▀▀░░░ ███▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░ ░███▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒█▄▄▒░░░░░░░ ░░███▓▓▓▓▓▒▒█▀▀▀▒░░░░░░ ░░░▀█▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒██░░██▒░░░ ░░░░░▀▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▀▀▒▒▒░░░ ░░░░░░▀▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░▀▓▓▓▓▓███▓▒░
November 2014

GG EZ

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░█▀▀▀░█▀▀▀░░█▀▀░▀▀█░░█░░░░ ░░░░█░▀█░█░▀█░░█▀▀░▄▀░░░▀░░░░ ░░░░▀▀▀▀░▀▀▀▀░░▀▀▀░▀▀▀░░▀░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
March 2021

Bernie Sanders chicken nuggest

Holy shit. My mom came into my room to bring me a plate of chicken nuggets and I literally screamed at her and hit the plate of chicken nuggets out of her hand. She started yelling and swearing at me and I slammed the door on her. I'm so distressed right now I don't know what to do. I didn't mean to do that to my mom but I'm literally in shock from the results tonight. I feel like I'm going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is he losing? This can't be happening. I'm having a fucking breakdown. I don't want to believe the world is so corrupt. I want a future to believe in. I want Bernie to be president and fix this broken country. I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasn't supposed to be like this, I thought he was polling well in New York???? This is so fucked.
April 2018

2016 US Election

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