Hippo

░░░░░░░░░░█▓██▓▓██▓█░░░ ░░░░░░░░░▓█▓█▓████▓██░░ ░░░░░░░░█▓▓▒  ▒▒▒  █░░ ░░░░░░░█▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█░░░░ ░░░░░█▓▓▓▓▓  ▒▒  ▒░░░░ ██░░█▓██▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒░░░░░░░ ██▓▓▓█(◐)█▓▓█▒▒▒▒░░░░░░░ █▓▓▓▓▓██▓▓▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░░░░ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█▓▒▒ ▒▒▒▒░ ░░░ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█▓▓▒ ▒▒▒▒▒ ▓░░░ ▓█▓▓▓▓▓█▓▒█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█░░░ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒██████░░░░░
November 2014

Beavis

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣆⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡤⠄⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣫⣭⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠩⢿⠯⣓⠛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣀⠐⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠦⠄⣰⡒⠶⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣭⣤⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣁⣀⡉⠁⠤⠄⠒⠛⠛⢋⣉⣵⣾⣿⣿⣿⡇⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡀⢲⣶⣶⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠸⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⡿⠋⠉⠄⠄⠉⠛⠛⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠈⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿
July 2022

Fortnite default dance 8

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣿⣉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠉⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿ ⠀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⣿⣶ ⣤⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣤ ⠉⠉⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠒⠛⠿⠿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠉⠿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣤⠀⠛⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣭⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⠉
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

This guy's wallet is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ “This guy's wallet is CRAZY!” ☑ “My bank account can't win against a payment like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely those two credit cards to win" ☑ “He bought the only card that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect purchase" ☑ “There was nothing I could buy" ☑ “I paid that perfectly"
twitch chat
February 2017

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Pasta copied, memes are dank. Reynad's streaming! Losing ranks!

twitchquotes: (✿ ◕‿◕) Pasta copied, memes are dank. Reynad's streaming! Losing ranks! (✿ ◕‿◕)
twitch chat
July 2015
Reynad

Your only friend is Twitch Chat

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan THAT MOMENT FeelsBadMan WHEN YOU REALIZE FeelsBadMan THAT YOUR ONLY FRIEND FeelsBadMan IS TWITCH CHAT FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
March 2017

Reynad was getting ready for his first HTC cast

twitchquotes: Reynad was getting ready for his first HTC cast. His palms were sweaty. Frodan sits next to him, "are you nervous Andrey?" Reynad wipes away his tears and says, "not anymore". They both smile and place their hands on each other's crotch under the desk. Reynad closes his eyes. KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

KappaPride

xqcP

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⡭⡩⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⡞⣫⠎⢠⠊⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⣛⣛⠋⠒⠽⠏⠄⠐⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣷⣧⣧⣇⣨⣮⣦⣉⣦⢻⣦⡈⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠈⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⠄⠄⢠⡿⢿⠿⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠉⠉⠉⠛⠃⡀⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣶⠶⠾⠿⠶⠿⠷⠚⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⡿⠃⢀⣒⠉⢙⠻⠿⠄⢹⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⢸⡿⠟⠱⠾⠃⢼⡀⢐⣼⠇⠄⢀⡜⣿⣿⡀⠄⢹⣅⠉⠼⢃⡀⠄⠈⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⢸⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠶⠂⣀⣴⣿⣷⢹⣿⣷⣦⣤⣶⣾⣿⠏⠁⠄⠄⣿ ⣇⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣴⣿⠟⣉⣹⣇⣿⣿⡟⢻⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⠛⢛⠼⢿⡿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠄⢰⣿ ⣿⣇⠄⠄⢸⣿⣷⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣉⡉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠛⢛⡛⠛⢀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⣭⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⣛⣋⣭⣥⠖⠂⣠⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡘⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⢁⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣍⣉⣙⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣋⣉⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2020
xQcOW

Please refrain from likening us to plebeians

twitchquotes: Twitch streamers and their subscribers define us (not subscribed audience) as members of a lower social class, plebs as they call it. I find it inappropriate to compare us with ancient Rome's lowest class as there is nothing ignominious to being a member of the proletariat. Also their living standards were significantly inferior to ours (e.g. health, education) so the comparison is unsound. In the future, please refrain from likening us to plebeians because descriminating due to economic and social status like that is reprehensible in our modern society.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

plebs vs subs

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked...

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out
March 2017

Classic

The Rock Eyebrow Raise / Can You Smell What The Rock Is Cooking?

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠺⣖⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡆⠀⠀⠀⢋⣭⣽⡚⢮⣲⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣅⣨⠇⠈⠀⠰⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⢷⣶⠶⣃⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠈⠓⠚⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠀⡄⣀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠐⠉⠀⠀⠙⠉⠀⠠⡶⣸⠁⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡆⠀⠐⠒⠢⢤⣀⡰⠁⠇⠈⠘⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣄⣉⣙⡉⠓⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
October 2021

Watermelon

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░█░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░░██░█░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░░░█░▄█░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░░░▄░░█░█░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░░░░░░░▓█▄█ ░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░░░░░░░░░▄█░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░▓█░▄█░█ ░░░░░░░░░▄▓░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░█ ░░░░░░░▄█░░░░░░░░░░░░▓█░▄░▄█ ░░░░░░▄█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░█░ ░░░░▄█░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄░░░█░▄█░ ░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░▄█░▄█░░ ░▄██░░░▓█░░▄█░░██░░░▄█░▄█░░░ ▒█░░█▓▄░░░░█░░░░░▄██░▄█░░░░░ ░░██▄░░██▓█▄▄██▓█░░▄█░░░░░░░ ░░░░░███▄▄░░░░▄▄█
July 2017

Only the chosen one can hold his donger

twitchquotes: 8=====> Only the chosen one can hold his donger ⎝ PogChamp
twitch chat
February 2016

Classic

Oops, sorry! This Twitch Chat message is only visible to TempoStorm Premium Subscribers

twitchquotes: [Oops, sorry! This Twitch Chat message is only visible to reynadTS TempoStorm Premium Subscribers reynadTS . Join today to read premium messages and become legendary!]
twitch chat
August 2015
Reynad

sellout

plebs vs subs

Xi Jinping Tanner

twitchquotes: So you’re going by Kripparian now, nerd? Haha what up, it’s Xi Jinping from China. Me and the other dictators used to give you a hard time. Sorry you were just an easy target. I see your social credit score is still low. Remember Mei Ling, the girl you had a crush on? Yeah, I have her organs now. I forcefully oppress over 1 billion people a year, and run a corrupt government. I guess some things never change, huh? Nice catching up, pathetic..
twitch chat
November 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

Just taking Reynad for a walk

twitchquotes: ╭( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)╯╲_____ PJSalt Oh, don't mind me, just taking Reynad for a walk.
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Classic

salty

I sexually identify as Harambe

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as Harambe. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of living in a gorilla enclosure at Cincinnati zoo and dragging children. People say to me that a person being Harambe is impossible and I'm retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install the name Harambe, harmless intentions and a gorillas body on me. From now on I want you guys to call me "Harambe" and respect my right to roam around the gorilla enclosure and drag around small children. If you can't accept me you're an agrizoophobe and need to check your zoo official privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
August 2016

Harambe

I sexually Identify as

forsenSanta

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣾⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠛⡛⣉⣉⣉⣩⣭⢥⡶⢒⣶⠖⣒⡤⢤⣄⡈⣩ ⠄⠄⠄⣼⡿⠛⣩⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣭⠛⠩⠁⠘⣾⣿⣿⣦⡄⠄⠥⢶⣤⣄⠘⢻⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⡿⠟⢛⡉⠉⠙⠛⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⡋⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠛⠄⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠘⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢠⠜⡛⠒⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⡇⠄⠐⠧⣀⡀⠄⠲⣾⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠔⠁⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣦⣄⡐⠄⢘⣭⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠤⣀⡀⣀⣀⣴⣮⣶⣏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣤⣴⣶⡄⠈⡀⠘⣿⡿⣿⡯⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠲⢼⣿⣿⣛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠰⣿⣶⣦⣤⣥⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣦⣤⣀⢀⣀⣉⣋⣏⡑⠄⠙⣿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠃⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣭⣬ ⠁⠄⢀⣠⣤⣶⣬⣭⣟⣛⣛⠋⠿⠿⠿⠛⠯⠥⠦⠝⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢀⠴⢟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣥⣬⣭⣽⣶⣶⣯⣥⣴⣭⣭⣭⣭ ⠄⢠⣿⢟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠸⢱⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

Doraemon

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠶⣶⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⢀⠈⢿⢀⣀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⣟⡇⢘⣾⣽⠀⠀⡏⠉⠙⢛⣿⣷⡖⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠿⠷⠶⠤⠙⠒⠀⠒⢻⣿⣿⡷⠋⠀⠴⠞⠋⠁⢙⣿⣄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣯⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠋⠉⠹⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣇⣀⣀⣀⣛⣛⣒⣲⢾⡷ ⢀⠤⠒⠒⢼⣿⣿⠶⠞⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣼⠃ ⢮⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠻⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⠉⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⣼⠃⠀ ⠈⠓⠶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠈⠒⢤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡠⠚⠁⠀⢀⡼⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣥⣤⣤⣤⣴⣟⠁
July 2020

I can't fucking believe this. Pink from 'Among Us' ruined my marriage.

I can't fucking believe this. Pink from 'Among Us' ruined my marriage. A couple months ago, my wife said she was going out for a ladies' night. She asked me to take care of my son, so I immediately obliged. "Yes Ma'am," I told her. After a while of waiting, she finally left and I could play my favourite game, Among Us. I hopped on my laptop, booted it up and my desktop loaded, complete with the 'Red Sus' background and all my Among Us Impostor fan-art. I was shaking in excitement. I slowly dragged my finger across the track pad, and watched the cursor as it glided over to the Among Us icon. Among Us. My absolute favourite game of all time and quite possibly the best and most well-made game in the entire world. As I clicked the button my body twitched with joy at the thought of being the impostor again. My fingers drummed impatiently on my desk as the Innersloth logo faded in, and then out. Then the main title appeared. I immediately looked at pink as she slowly floated across the screen. Oh, how I wish I could feel those luscious, soft asscheeks. Pink is my queen. The real woman in my life. My wife could never be as sexy as Pink is; her soft footfalls in electrical as I peek at her curvy form from inside a vent, waiting for the right time to strike. I could never get close to Pink, however, as if she had some kind of sixth sense, she would always leave before I could reveal myself to her as the impostor. I press Practice, to warm up my fingers before my first intense game of Among Us. I hit Blue in Comms, then cross the hall and vent to Specimen, murdering Green in cold blood. The thrill of killing an animated character in an online game has never been such a rush. I then move towards Reactor, stabbing Yellow in the back and then running down the corridor to the right to access Decontamination. I move quietly through the halls, like a snake about to strike its prey, and I see- Oh no. It's Pink. Standing there motionlessly as I face her directly. Her visor shows no emotion. But she knows. I can feel it in the air. I can't kill her. She is too beautiful, too angelic, the light reflecting off of her pink bodysuit, like stars on a voided sky. She doesn't run. I am moved to tears as I caress the screen, kissing it tenderly. "Goodbye, Pink. See you soon. It will all be okay," I whisper in a soft, reassuring voice. Then as my cursor hovers over the kill button, I hesitate. Thoughts of love go through my head. Red having reddish-pink sus children with Pink. But I have to. As the impostor, it is my duty to kill. I press the 'Kill' button and watch as my character beheads Pink silently. All I hear is the spurt of blood. There is no rush. There is only Red, standing by himself in Fuel. Pink's lifeless body laying on the floor beside him. I feel nothing at first, then immense sadness, like I'm at a loved one's funeral. My son knocks on the door, interrupting my brief moment of mourning. He asks, "Dad? Are you going to make me a snack?" I tell him to shut up, and my voice cracks. I break down sobbing. I killed her. I killed my one true love. God, forgive me. I open the door to my son, and he has a confused look on his face. I say nothing, and walk to the kitchen to make him a sandwich. Tears roll off my face into the bread as I lay it onto the counter. Lettuce, cheese and meat, followed by a sad swirl of mustard on top. My son is quiet. He sits on the couch, and stares at the floor. There is a depressing air around us. I serve him the sandwich and walk back to my room, contemplating life. If I killed Pink, how am I to be trusted around my family? I cry for hours, and finally my wife comes back. She sees me bawling on the bed like a child who dropped his ice cream. She then asks me why I'm crying and mutter, "I killed her. I killed my only love, Pink, in Among Us." She is filled with rage and slaps me across my face. I feel numb. She asks for a divorce. I don't reply. Instead, I take my laptop and get into my car, driving to a nearby hotel. Fast forward a few months to the divorce. It was quick and painless. After court, I ask my former wife to take me back. "I can't take you back. You've always been this way. I was sus of you from the start." Edit: Found this on steam, in the Among Us reviews section.
May 2021

Among Us / Amogus

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