Hi, my name is anon and I have a 3 year old cat named Starlet. He usually spends a lot of time outside and gets hyper whenever he hears a plastic bag. I have a bed for him next to my bed but he prefers to sleep in a little box with a pillow in it I got from my neighbor for my birthday. I read bedtime stories to him every day.
Lately I read part of a story about a guy from the Victorian era who specialized in making and playing a magic harmonica (echo by Pam Muñoz) and he fell asleep on the couch so I covered him with my sweater and went to bed.
Then the next day he started acting weird. He quit having zoomies whenever I opened a bag or cooked something and just waited patiently to be fed and now only responds to being called "Sir Starlet". He went outside at 10:00 with a sock and came back at 12 with some rubber bands like he was trading with other cats or something.
Now he wants to wear my top hat, my bow tie and a monocle (which is really just a dismembered glasses lens) almost all the time. He looks in the mirror at least 3 times a day and has gained an appreciation for classical music, with his favorite song being canon in D by Pachelbel. I can't blame him though because I love that song too. He's not home right now and he's probably discussing trade agreements with the stray cats.
Edit: I decide to step outside for a minute and I see him walking the neighbor's dog. I talked to my neighbor about this and he said he's paying my cat for this?? I'm gonna need a while to process this.
TL;DR: My cat might be able to run for mayor.
Submitted by:u/_-Anonymous__-
I think there's something wrong with my cat. Should I be worried? Is my cat a capitalist?
Hi, my name is anon and I have a 3 year old cat named Starlet. He usually spends a lot of time outside and gets hyper whenever he hears a plastic bag. I have a bed for him next to my bed but he prefers to sleep in a little box with a pillow in it I got from my neighbor for my birthday. I read bedtime stories to him every day.
Lately I read part of a story about a guy from the Victorian era who specialized in making and playing a magic harmonica (echo by Pam Muñoz) and he fell asleep on the couch so I covered him with my sweater and went to bed.
Then the next day he started acting weird. He quit having zoomies whenever I opened a bag or cooked something and just waited patiently to be fed and now only responds to being called "Sir Starlet". He went outside at 10:00 with a sock and came back at 12 with some rubber bands like he was trading with other cats or something.
Now he wants to wear my top hat, my bow tie and a monocle (which is really just a dismembered glasses lens) almost all the time. He looks in the mirror at least 3 times a day and has gained an appreciation for classical music, with his favorite song being canon in D by Pachelbel. I can't blame him though because I love that song too. He's not home right now and he's probably discussing trade agreements with the stray cats.
Edit: I decide to step outside for a minute and I see him walking the neighbor's dog. I talked to my neighbor about this and he said he's paying my cat for this?? I'm gonna need a while to process this.
TL;DR: My cat might be able to run for mayor.
Trolling...you call that fucking trolling!? I'll have you know that I am a part of the Trolling Federation and will NOT tolerate your wannabe attempt at trolling you little shitheaded cocksucker. You are far from a troll you little nerd, I will be telling my friends at the OKW to find you, extermination you for this endeavour! You should feel ashamed!
Submitted by:Jetstream Karl (Sigmawave)
A copypasta about some guy getting angry at someone for trolling.
Trolling...you call that fucking trolling!? I'll have you know that I am a part of the Trolling Federation and will NOT tolerate your wannabe attempt at trolling you little shitheaded cocksucker. You are far from a troll you little nerd, I will be telling my friends at the OKW to find you, extermination you for this endeavour! You should feel ashamed!
Эй, Дед НС, выходи,
SUBprise
Тебя заждались мы,
SUBprise
И песню про Пангу
SUBprise
Меня заказывать достало!
SUBprise
Покажись нам,
SUBprise
Не нервируй детей,
SUBprise
Мы крикнем: «Дед НС! Эгеге!»
Submitted by:anonymous
Эй, Дед НС, выходи,
SUBprise
Тебя заждались мы,
SUBprise
И песню про Пангу
SUBprise
Меня заказывать достало!
SUBprise
Покажись нам,
SUBprise
Не нервируй детей,
SUBprise
Мы крикнем: «Дед НС! Эгеге!»
Bitte setzen Sie ein 18+-Tag auf diesen Stream. Ich war im Bus und als ich maxim sah, musste ich wütend anfangen zu masturbieren. Alle anderen warfen mir seltsame Blicke zu und sagten Dinge wie "Was zum Teufel" und "Ruft die Polizei". Ich ließ mein Handy fallen und alle um mich herum sahen diesen Stream. Jetzt gibt es einen ganzen Bus von Leuten, die gemeinsam auf diesen Stream masturbieren. Das ist alles deine Schuld, du hättest das verhindern können, wenn du diesen Stream einfach als 18+ gekennzeichnet hättest.
Submitted by:anonymous
Bitte setzen Sie ein 18+-Tag auf diesen Stream. Ich war im Bus und als ich maxim sah, musste ich wütend anfangen zu masturbieren. Alle anderen warfen mir seltsame Blicke zu und sagten Dinge wie "Was zum Teufel" und "Ruft die Polizei". Ich ließ mein Handy fallen und alle um mich herum sahen diesen Stream. Jetzt gibt es einen ganzen Bus von Leuten, die gemeinsam auf diesen Stream masturbieren. Das ist alles deine Schuld, du hättest das verhindern können, wenn du diesen Stream einfach als 18+ gekennzeichnet hättest.
This happened a few days ago. I was looking at fanart of Dream in class. The kid sitting next to me looked over at my computer and then made some insensitive comment about how Dream cheated (obvious Nazi propaganda) and that his videos suck. This made me irritated - yet another Dreamphobe harassing me. I called him out and told him that he was acting Dreamphobic because he was oppressing me, a Dreamsexual person, and then he laughed in my face. He said, "Dreamsexual? Is that when you want to suck Dream's dick or something?" I said yes and he looked at me weirdly and asked if I was joking. I decided to pull up this subreddit to help explain Dreamsexuality and Dreamgender. He said that it "didn't exist" and that we were "just overly-obsessed Dream stans", then said that we were mentally ill. I was livid. I was shaking, too - he doesn't have the right to speak about Dreamsexuality like this. I figured I should follow the advice given to me on this sub before, which is that you should always defend yourself if a Dreamphobe is harassing you. I turn to him and give him a punch to his face (I was only using a bit of power to teach him a lesson). A bunch of people turn around and the entire class was looking at us. My ignorant teacher went over and pulled me into the hall and told me that I was being "highly inappropriate" and violent. I said that the kid was discriminating against my sexuality, but he claimed that didn't warrant me punching him and that I could've handled it in a "more civil manner". I ended up in detention. The school staff said they're "looking into" the other kid's harassment. I hate being in my Dreamphobic school. Has anyone else here been wrongfully punished for defending yourself? Dreamphobes are true evil and it's a shame that they have so many bigots willing to defend them.
Submitted by:nunyabus iness
My dreamphobic school
This happened a few days ago. I was looking at fanart of Dream in class. The kid sitting next to me looked over at my computer and then made some insensitive comment about how Dream cheated (obvious Nazi propaganda) and that his videos suck. This made me irritated - yet another Dreamphobe harassing me. I called him out and told him that he was acting Dreamphobic because he was oppressing me, a Dreamsexual person, and then he laughed in my face. He said, "Dreamsexual? Is that when you want to suck Dream's dick or something?" I said yes and he looked at me weirdly and asked if I was joking. I decided to pull up this subreddit to help explain Dreamsexuality and Dreamgender. He said that it "didn't exist" and that we were "just overly-obsessed Dream stans", then said that we were mentally ill. I was livid. I was shaking, too - he doesn't have the right to speak about Dreamsexuality like this. I figured I should follow the advice given to me on this sub before, which is that you should always defend yourself if a Dreamphobe is harassing you. I turn to him and give him a punch to his face (I was only using a bit of power to teach him a lesson). A bunch of people turn around and the entire class was looking at us. My ignorant teacher went over and pulled me into the hall and told me that I was being "highly inappropriate" and violent. I said that the kid was discriminating against my sexuality, but he claimed that didn't warrant me punching him and that I could've handled it in a "more civil manner". I ended up in detention. The school staff said they're "looking into" the other kid's harassment. I hate being in my Dreamphobic school. Has anyone else here been wrongfully punished for defending yourself? Dreamphobes are true evil and it's a shame that they have so many bigots willing to defend them.
Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Submitted by:anonymous
Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
theasshorror Guys,
About everything that happened last week, I want to explain my side of the story.
I'm truly happy that I have a big group of dedicated fans that I love,
but unfortunately I also have a group of haters that have been stalking me for many years.
This bullying is not only online but also against my family and beloved ones.
It also contains inappropriate private video's from many years ago, that was spread all around the internet. I cannot go into details but I am working on this with my lawyer to stop this harassment.
The situation some people put me in, makes me really angry and sad sometimes with the result I react different than I really want. But even if it's not an excuse to react this way and use this kind of bad language on social media, I'm a fighter and it's happened in my emotion. Things blew up because of my own actions last week, and that was wrong.
I am aware I need to change myself and grow as a person, and I hope you all understand me a little bit more. There will always be people to try to take me down but with this said, I want to apologize to everybody I disappointed, as well as my agency and music label.
To my fans: you never let me down, I have to concentrate more on you than on the haters. Especially for you I will never stop making music and make you all happy.
Thanks 4 all your support last days.
I love you all.
Peace.
Kenzo
Submitted by:TheDogHorror
The Goofiest Copypasta from an asshole
theasshorror Guys,
About everything that happened last week, I want to explain my side of the story.
I'm truly happy that I have a big group of dedicated fans that I love,
but unfortunately I also have a group of haters that have been stalking me for many years.
This bullying is not only online but also against my family and beloved ones.
It also contains inappropriate private video's from many years ago, that was spread all around the internet. I cannot go into details but I am working on this with my lawyer to stop this harassment.
The situation some people put me in, makes me really angry and sad sometimes with the result I react different than I really want. But even if it's not an excuse to react this way and use this kind of bad language on social media, I'm a fighter and it's happened in my emotion. Things blew up because of my own actions last week, and that was wrong.
I am aware I need to change myself and grow as a person, and I hope you all understand me a little bit more. There will always be people to try to take me down but with this said, I want to apologize to everybody I disappointed, as well as my agency and music label.
To my fans: you never let me down, I have to concentrate more on you than on the haters. Especially for you I will never stop making music and make you all happy.
Thanks 4 all your support last days.
I love you all.
Peace.
Kenzo