[Copypasta] Twitch in 2025

Imposter

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ascii art

January 2021

Among Us / Amogus

I am not a simp.

twitchquotes: And I want to say this to the kings in the audience. I’ve made my mistakes in my chase for coochie. But in all of my years of chad life, I have never simped– never simped for a girl. I’ve earned every bit of cooch. And in all of my years of chad life, I have never paid for the meal. Because people have got to know whether or not I’m a simp. Well, I’m not a simp. I’ve never simped for any girl I’ve got. I am not a simp.

twitch chat

July 2020

Simps

Biden's America

The year is 2021. You look at the television. SIlver fox President Biden announces a vaccine mandate for employees. You clutch your limited edition Trump Funko Pop. It has begun. You gather up all your belongings, and jump into your truck, hitting the highway for the airport. Out of your rearview mirror you can make out a sleek black Prius pursuing you. You make out the numbers “1” “9” “8” and 4” on their license plate. You are able to lose the Prius and arrive at the airport. You are almost free. At airport security You see a young man being dragged away screaming. The guards yell something about him having more than 3.4 oz of liquid. Thankfully you only have an AR 15 on you. The guard inspects it. “It’s for hunting,” you say. They hand it back to you and wave for you to move along. You breathe a sigh of relief. “One more thing.” You turn to see a Guard staring down at you with their beady soulless eyes. “I need to see your vaccination card” It is too late. You try to run away, but you feel someone press a cloth against your face. Reality fades away. You wake up in some kind of lab, chained down to an operation table and gagged. The room is undecorated except for a single poster of Harry Styles in a dress on the wall. A single figure stands in the corner shrouded in shadow, fiddling with a syringe. As they step out of the shadow, you can make out their face, the roguishly handsome Gavin Newsom. He positions a large surgical headlight above you and turns it on. He holds up the large syringe to the light and chuckles, staring into your pleading eyes. “Don't worry, it will all be over soon” He removes his mask to reveal his serpent's tongue, flickering in amusement. He plunges the syringe straight through your “socialism is for figs” shirt into your arm. “Nighty night” Your world fades to black once more.

October 2021

Joe Biden

Politics

Somewhere in a parallel universe, Reynad isn't salty

twitchquotes: ★　　★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ 　★　 :.　 . • ○ ° ★　 .　 *　.　.　　¸ .　　 ° 　¸. * ● ¸ .　...somewhere　　　° ☾ ° 　¸. ● ¸ .　　★　° :.　 . • ° 　 .　 *　:.　.in a parallel universe* ● ¸ 　　　　° ☾ °☆ 　. * ¸.　　　★　★ ° . .　　　　.　☾ °☆ 　. * ● ¸ ..Reynad...° ☾　★ °● ¸ .　　　★　° :.　 . • ○ ° ★　 .　 * Isn't salty ☾　★ °● ¸ .　　　★　°

twitch chat

July 2014

Reynad

Classic

Hearthstone

salty

You are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza

twitchquotes: "Kripp my son," say the Papparin, "you are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza." But the Kripp don't respond. He elopes to Greece and runs his hand through his unshaven face scruff and say "Well met!" to the twisted Succubus. Alone in his heart, Papparin commits sudoku at a Starbucks in San Bernardino with Al Pacino, no cappucino.

twitch chat

April 2014

Kripp

[Copypasta] Twitch in 2025

Imposter

Among Us / Amogus

I am not a simp.

Simps

Biden's America

Joe Biden

Politics

Somewhere in a parallel universe, Reynad isn't salty

Classic

Hearthstone

salty

You are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza

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