[Copypasta] Stimulus talks going well in 2946

The year is 2946, Robot Mitch McConnel and Cyborg Nancy Pelosi report stimulus talks going well. The Dow rewards them and hits 6.02 x 1023.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/kmmuco/what_are_your_moves_tomorrow_december_30_2020/ghfik24
What happened to this ad? :(
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Jack Ma goes missing

Jack Ma is making poop emoji pillows in a factory now 11 hours a day and you guys are making jokes about him πŸ˜”
January 2021

WallStreetBets

WSB Choose your fighter

Choose your fighter Alex Magikarp 🐟 Elon TechnoCuckLord πŸ€–+🀴 Jeff Divorcedzos πŸ’” Salmonella πŸ” Nutella 🍫 Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman 🀑 Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya 🍈 Ryan Cocken your butthole πŸ₯’πŸ’¦ πŸ‘‰πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜³ πŸ₯’ Z πŸ₯’ U πŸ₯’ C πŸ₯’ C πŸ₯’ Tim 🍎 Bottom πŸ…±οΈENIS Jack Ma MIA πŸ€·β€β™‚οΈ Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the 🐻s' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods πŸ™βœοΈ
March 2021

WallStreetBets

WSB Buy $COCK

Buy $COCK. I heard WSB is buying $COCK and $COCK IS THE NEXT BIG THING. $COCK IS RISING TODAY. Do your own DD on $COCK and let me know how much you like $COCK. πŸ’ŽβœŠ your πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€ $COCK to the πŸŒ‘
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Robinhood halts trading on President's Day

This is bullshit. I’m disgusted and I’m honestly on the verge of having a mental fucking breakdown. Robinhood has once again halted trading. But this time it’s halted on all stocks. This fine Monday morning I wake up to find that all orders aren’t going to be filled till tomorrow morning. My dad’s wife’s girlfriend is a powerful lawyer in Boca Raton and I’m seriously considering retaining her services and filing a class action lawsuit against these citadel dick munchers. This has happened to me too many times. I’m low key spiraling into madness. Donate to me on onlyfans if you want to contribute towards the legal fees. She’s giving me a pretty kickass discount, but she estimates it’s still going to cost $150k. This happens to be the amount I lost on gme, but this is not relevant to the conversation here. It’s time to rise up and take down robinhood once and for all. Also, yeah my stepmom has a girlfriend. It’s 2021 you bigots.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

GME short squeeze

Lets dumb this down for you apes: - Let's say 5 banana's currently cost 10 dollar - One ape on the market has 5 banana's - Snake asks to borrow 5 banana's for a bit and instead sells the 5 banana's thinking price will go down soon (shorting). he thinks he can buy them later for less and give them back to ape, so he make's profit on the difference. - Group of apes notice what stupid snakes are doing and decide to buy all banana's on the market until snakes have no other choice than to buy from the group of apes in order to return what they borrowed - If group of apes stay strong then price will go πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€
January 2021

WallStreetBets

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