[Copypasta] Dear streamer, I will be joining the doubters

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“œ โœ๏ธ Sadge ๐““๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป [streamer name] , ๐“˜ ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ฐ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐“ฏ๐“พ๐“ต๐“ต๐”‚ ๐”€๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ซ๐“ฎ ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ผ๐“ฒ๐“ฐ๐“ท๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฏ๐“ป๐“ธ๐“ถ ๐“ซ๐“ฎ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ช ๐“ซ๐“ฎ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ฟ๐“ฎ๐“ป ๐“ช๐“ท๐“ญ ๐”€๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ซ๐“ฎ ๐“ณ๐“ธ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ ๐“ญ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ซ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ป๐“ผ ๐“ฒ๐“ท ๐“ญ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ซ๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ป ๐“ช๐“ซ๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ผ.
twitch chat
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth

According to my scientific studies, Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth. I am being 100 percent serious when I say this. This shouldn't even be an unpopular opinion, people just don't think about what the word "difficult" actually means. Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth. Giving birth is definitely more painful, but pain by itself does not make something difficult. For example, putting my hand in a fire is not difficult, but it would hurt a lot. In order for something to be difficult, there has to be some chance of failure due to lack of skill, practice, or technique. Peeing with a boner often requires creative problem solving skills, especially in small spaces. There is no creative problem solving aspect of giving birth. Additionally, the way humans have evolved for these two actions supports my point. Giving birth is a natural process, which humans have evolved to be able to do. The female body is literally designed so that it can give birth with the lowest possible chance of error. The only real error that can happen is a miscarriage, which is also a natural occurrence, not a failure that occurs due to a lack of skill in giving birth. The male body, on the other hand, has evolved specifically so that peeing with a boner is very difficult. The only purpose for having a boner is to impregnate a woman, so the male body evolved to prevent urination during sex. On top of the difficulty in simply getting the pee to flow, there's the issue of actually positioning yourself so that the boner is pointing into the toilet bowl (urinals are much easier, but not always an option). In the past, I have had to give up and wait until my boner goes away because it was simply too difficult to actually pee in the toilet. There has never been a case where a woman has tried to give birth after being pregnant for nine months, not been able to do it, and said "fuck it" and waited 3 more months to try again because it would be easier the second try. Giving birth happens, every single time, because it's a natural process - peeing with a boner is the opposite.
May 2021

The salt from your stream sucked the venom out of my wound

twitchquotes: Dear reynard. I was hiking in the Amazon Rainforest the other day when I was bit by a snake. Miles from the nearest city, I thought my life was over as the venom slowly spread across my body. But then I used my 4G to open twitch and the salt from your stream sucked the venom out of my wound and saved my life. Thanks Reynad!
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

My 12 year old son watches Rick and Morty

twitchquotes: Today my 12 year old son and I walked into harvard to sign him up for college. The dean rudly asked what a 12 year old was doing signing up for such a prestigious institute like harvard. My son took of to reveal his Rick and Morty shirt and proclaimed "Well you see sir I watch Rick and Morty". A look of confusion came over the deans face and I have never been so proud. The dean quickly made sure to appologize to my son but it was too late, the police rushed in and dragged him out. My son passed all his classes with 4.0s and graduated top of his class in the first day of college.
twitch chat
October 2017

Rick and Morty

Mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat

twitchquotes: FeelsRageMan Dear mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat FeelsRageMan This will be the last message I ever send your ass FeelsRageMan
twitch chat
September 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

The Bola

twitchquotes: QT this is your Dr. It seems your subs have all gotten not only "The Bola" but also type 2 diabetes. I believe it is the combination of missed arrows and you to wanting become a pizza. Stop before you also get The Bola.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

League of Legends

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