I used to be a real ad
Sort by:

No girlfriend. No friends. No talents.

twitchquotes: 4Head No girlfriend 4Head No friends 4Head No talents 4Head Saturday night alone 4Head Wasting time on Twitch 4Head Watching a dead game 4Head Reading the chat more than the stream 4Head Spamming pastas brainlessly 4Head Must be me
twitch chat
September 2018

mizkif maybe if u werent such an asshole

twitchquotes: lmao mizkif maybe if u werent such an asshole with a huge ego maybe the cool streamers like mitch jones would come over and learn mario 64 speed running tricks with you. lmao but ur just depressed its actually sad ur sad, i would know i'm a hate watcher that used to make $600k a month... anyway my dad's coming downstairs gotta go
twitch chat
May 2020
Mizkif
What happened to this ad? :(

Hey guys I'll be playing HS today

twitchquotes: BrokeBack Hey guys I'll be playing HS today BrokeBack Watch as I play children cards and whine about RNG for 6 hours BrokeBack How fun and interactive! BrokeBack Please join the 5 dollar club for more amazing content BrokeBack
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

It's not gay if it's ANIME

twitchquotes: IT'S KappaPride NOT KappaPride GAY KappaPride IF KappaPride IT'S KappaPride ANIME KappaPride
twitch chat
July 2017

KappaPride

Twitch Chat Examination Team

twitchquotes: Hello this is the Twitch Chat Examination Team here with anther experiment. We are testing how quickly a message typed into chat is copied and pasted by the mindless hordes. Please, if you're reading this, spread awareness for our cause.
twitch chat
March 2015
imaqtpie
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

You will never be a crewmate

You will never be a crewmate. You have no purpose on this ship, you have no tasks, you have no mini games to play. You are an impostor twisted into a crude mockery of crewmatery. All the validation you get is two-faced and halfhearted. In emergency meetings people call you sus. The other players are disgusted and ashamed of you, your friends laugh at your sussy appearance in ghost chat. Crewmates are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of games have allowed crewmates to identify impostors with incredible efficiency. Even impostors who fake tasks act uncanny and suspicious to a crewmate. Your jumping in vents is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a crewmate to electrical with you, he'll turn tail and use the emergency button the second he gets the suspicion that you sabotaged. You will never be a winner. You wrench out a fake task every single game and tell yourself it is going to be a win, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight. Eventually it will be too much to bear - people will vote you out for being sus and will plunge you into the cold abyss. Your parents will report your body, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They will eject you with a headstone marked with your birth tag, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know an impostor is drifting there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably sus.
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

I want to impregnate Belle Delphine so bad

December 2020

Belle Delphine

Kappa clap

twitchquotes: Kappa //
twitch chat
May 2017

This is why I say the LCS has been going downhill

twitchquotes: This is why I say the LCS has been going downhill. They bring a TFT player onto the analyst desk for a summoner's rift game. He clearly has no idea what's going on. "Scarra" is it? Has anyone heard of this guy?
twitch chat
August 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

LS, aka "Life Support"

twitchquotes: LS, aka "Life Support", is a dying streamer for CLG and a commentator for the LCK that is often ridiculed for playing the same 5 songs every stream and questionable tft game knowledge. He is specifically known for his varus one trick pony in low gold korean tft solo-queue.
twitch chat
July 2019
imls

League of Legends

I used to be a real ad

I donโ€™t know what Overwatch is

twitchquotes: I donโ€™t know what Overwatch is. Thereโ€™s a gorilla and some lesbians and guns but yall never play the gorilla I donโ€™t know. And then sometimes if that wasnโ€™t bad enough sometimes you go and just invent new Overwatches. Like just when Iโ€™m getting a handle on what โ€œJunkrat kin discourseโ€ is yall show up with โ€œThis is my new OC her name is Grandma Sniperโ€ and then SHEโ€™S part of the Overwatchers. โ€œThis is Swedish Beefcakeโ€ could yall? not?? I still donโ€™t know what a Hanzo is.
twitch chat
April 2021

Overwatch

Idk what it is with you guys but you keep upvoting anything with the word cum sex or dick in it

Idk what it is with you guys but you keep upvoting anything with the word cum sex or dick in it. I came here for subtle wall of texts where you couldnโ€™t tell if it was real or fake. Now these 10k upvoted cumshit copypastas are just upvoted, never pasted. You donโ€™t actually see any of them in the wild itโ€™s a truly sad state. See for yourself sort by top this year and itโ€™s all sex like fr is it that funny?
September 2021

YOU'RE A GIRL GAMER?!

wait, wait, wait.... hold your horses... uhm... YOU'RE A GIRL GAMER?!!?! O_o_O Not to be a freak, but.. just when I thought you couldn't get more attractive.. you started playing video games. Nicely done, m'lady. You've just become every man's dream woman. If you had missed a couple before, now you can be sure you've got us ALL "drooling", lol.
May 2021

Simps

I've never even heard or seen moonmoon

twitchquotes: I've never even heard or seen moonmoon but I really hope he isn't as bad as his dumbfuck subs are. I know I'm generalizing but I don't really care, the past few days that I've had to see moonmoon subs spam their same stupid fucking copypasta has been the worst chat experience I have ever had to witness, waving around the 5 dollars they got for doing chores around the house once, trying so hard to fit into their smeg xD spamming clique, it's honestly so obnoxious I want to drink bleach right now.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

A teacher asked the class, "what is SEX?"

A teacher asked the class, "what is SEX?" Johnny got up and said, "Sex is a TEMPTATION which causes a SENSATION when a boy sticks his LOCATION into a girl's DESTINATION which increases the POPULATION for the next GENERATION. Do you get my EXPLANATION? or do you need a DEMONSTRATION?" The teacher fainted.
April 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

I've won 69 rounds of Fortnite

twitchquotes: ๐“›๐“˜๐“ผ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ท ๐“พ๐“น ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฝ๐“ต๐“ฎ ๐“ซ๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฌ๐“ฑ, ๐“ฒ'๐“ฟ๐“ฎ ๐“ซ๐“ฎ๐“ฎ๐“ท ๐“ฝ๐“ป๐“ช๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฏ๐“ธ๐“ป ๐“ธ๐“ฟ๐“ฎ๐“ป 90 ๐”‚๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ผ ๐“ช๐“ท๐“ญ ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ ๐“ฌ๐“ธ๐“ถ๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ๐“ป๐“ฎ ๐“ช๐“ท๐“ญ ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ถ๐“ฎ ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ'๐“ป๐“ฎ ๐“ซ๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ป ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ช๐“ท ๐“ถ๐“ฎ? ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ด ๐“ช๐“ฐ๐“ช๐“ฒ๐“ท ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฝ๐“ต๐“ฎ ๐“น๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ฌ๐“ฎ ๐“ธ๐“ฏ ๐“ผ๐“ฑ๐“ฒ๐“ฝ, ๐“ฒ'๐“ฟ๐“ฎ ๐”€๐“ธ๐“ท 69 ๐“ป๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ท๐“ญ๐“ผ ๐“ธ๐“ฏ ๐“•๐“ธ๐“ป๐“ฝ๐“ท๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฝ๐“ต๐“ฎ ๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ฒ๐“ธ๐“ฝ. ๐“˜'๐“ฟ๐“ฎ ๐”€๐“ธ๐“ท ๐“ช๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ธ๐“ฏ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ ๐“ผ๐“ด๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ผ ๐“ฒ๐“ท ๐“•๐“ธ๐“ป๐“ท๐“๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ, ๐“˜ ๐“ฐ๐“ธ๐“ฝ ๐“ช๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ ๐“ฐ๐“พ๐“ท๐“ผ ๐“ช๐“ท๐“ญ ๐”€๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“น๐“ธ๐“ท๐“ผ. ๐“จ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ป ๐“ณ๐“พ๐“ผ๐“ฝ ๐“ช๐“ท ๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ฒ๐“ธ๐“ฝ ๐“ผ๐”€๐“ช๐“ฝ, ๐“ซ๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฌ๐“ฑ.
twitch chat
September 2018

Fortnite

XQC's chat makes me sick

twitchquotes: Don't you guys feel any embarrassment? Being trash in chat and in TTS all day and being full of shit while XQC is trying to give us juicer content? A lot of you guys are a disgrace to me and to others who're trying to enjoy the stream. You people make me sick
twitch chat
June 2020
xQcOW

Solo is one of my favorite Star Wars movies

twitchquotes: Action-packed, fast-paced while exploring deeper themes of oppression, power, and values... what's not to love?! Solo is personally one of my favorite Star Wars movies. Plenty of throwbacks to the old films while offering some foreshadowing. [$0.25 deposited in your PayPalโ„ข. Remember to delete this part before posting]
twitch chat
September 2018

sellout

MLK day emojipasta

heyyy ๐Ÿ‘‹ Marthin Luther QUEENS ๐Ÿ‘ฏโ€โ™€๏ธ i have a dream ๐Ÿ˜ด ๐Ÿ›Œ that you will be dicked ๐Ÿ† down โฌ‡๏ธ tonight like DADDY ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฟโ€๐Ÿฆณ Martin Luther King Jr. would have wanted ๐Ÿ˜ŒโœŠ๐Ÿฟ so MARCH ๐Ÿšถโ€โ™€๏ธ on down โฌ‡๏ธ to his washington monument ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ and have a SIT IN ๐ŸงŽโ€โ™€๏ธ on that DICK ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ† Make sure to ABOLISH his KKKOCK ๐Ÿ—ฝ like a TRUE PATRIOT ๐Ÿ—ฝ segregate those cheeks ๐Ÿ‘ tonight it doesnโ€™t matter ๐Ÿ™…โ€โ™€๏ธ if his fountain ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆ is BLACK or WHITE ๐Ÿค we are all CUMRADES ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ in the fight against discrimination ๐Ÿ˜ SOAK those PANTIFA ๐Ÿฉฒ our TWERK is not over โ€ผ๏ธ SEND this ๐Ÿ“ค to โœŒ๏ธ every WOKE HOE ๐Ÿคฏ you know ๐Ÿ†˜ Get 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ BACK to END racism โœŠ and UNITE the races in SEXUAL ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ HARMONY โ˜ฎ๏ธ
January 2024

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

MLK Day

I used to be a real ad

Mods are the true evil in this world

twitchquotes: As a Pleb, I understand and, indeed, respect the social order. But I believe Subs and Plebs must work together and realize Mods are the true evil in this world. With the power of SPAM
twitch chat
August 2017

MODS

Text-to-Speech Playing