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Privyet, Komrade Toast!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Toast! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic chess game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Teamfight Tactics

76gb homework folder

twitchquotes: WeirdEyes You really think that 76GB homework folder is fooling anybody WeirdEyes
twitch chat
September 2018
What happened to this ad? :(

Kappa is no longer working

twitchquotes: ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ATTENTION ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime Someone has reported that the kappa emote is no longer working. Please type "Ka ppa" (no spaces) to confirm that it is indeed still working. Kappa
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

QTPie calls all his subs dudes

twitchquotes: Does anyone ever notice how QT calls all his subs dudes? Honestly this is the only reason I don't subscribe. As a 16 year old female from cali I would not like to be called a dude when I have female genitalia. Please spread awareness.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Kripp, it's your son Krippunks from the future

twitchquotes: Kripp, it's your son Krippunks from the future. In the year 2020, the Earth is attacked by a series of Hearthstone Bots called RNGdroids 17 and 18. Everyone dies except Reynad and me. He trains me to be a Salt Warrior. You must train to defeat the RNGdroids!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Going against the Summoners Code

twitchquotes: Hello twitch chat, this is "xXswaglordDarienXx" from Rito Games. I've noticed a lot of you are copy pasting the same message over and over again and that unfortunately goes against the Summoners Code, so I will be forced to ban everyone in this chat. Thank you and please do not copy and paste this message.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Please dont talk about melee in an ultimate chat 😡

twitchquotes: honestly melee is dead, it has been since smash 4. Please dont talk about melee in a smash ultimate chat. 😡
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

Everyone please STOP SPAMMING

twitchquotes: Everyone, please STOP SPAMMING, it is very INCONSIDERATE of the folks who are trying to have REAL CONVERSATIONS. Plz no copy pastarino Frappaccino-mochaccino-capuccino, macarino Eddie Pasterino pepperoncino kakaino poopieino peepeeino dickarino assarino skillswiperino salterino bad-luckerino Al Pacino with his dongerino in San Bernardino.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Please top switching the first 2 letters of words

twitchquotes: Dear chat, please top switching the first 2 letters of words; thereby forming a new or complety bogus word. For example in the two word sentence: "MIC MUTED". I and manny others have no idea what this means because you have switched the M with M and the M with the M. This confuses me to infinity. Thanks in advanced.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

XL Super Sized Monster

twitchquotes: "Oh my God," gasped Raina. That thing is HUGE, its going to make me so wet!. Kripp smirked, "Yup." He began pumping furiously as the pressure built up and his Vegan strength began to dwindle. "Are you ready?" Kripp said cheekily. "I don't know about this, I think we should..." but it was too late. Kripp blasted her point blank, gentlely bruising her skin with a pressure rating well above 2. "Next time you can do me," said Kripp as he put away his XL Super Sized Monster.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Worry about a tree, miss the entire forest

twitchquotes: ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ノ And if you only worry about a tree, you'll miss the entire forest around it ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ノ-Sage Dong
twitch chat
November 2014
Trump

I want to be a box

twitchquotes: Hello My name is Juan Taquito, and My dream is to become a cardboard box, I go home to my family of 12 children daily, searching online for how to become a box, that is why i will watch BoxBox every day, to learn his ways and reach my true form.
twitch chat
July 2014
flosd

Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Kripp, on behalf of the entire Greek country, I would like to thank you for single handedly restoring our economy with your endless supplies of salt. Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export. Most excellent, all hail Kripperino!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps

twitchquotes: Trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable *** off the face of the continent, you little ***. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your *** tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will *** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re *** dead, kiddo.
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Viewbots

I used to be a real ad

This means absolutely nothing

twitchquotes: ✞ĦЇϟ ℳ€∀Иϟ Å฿ϟϴℒÜ✝ℰℒ¥ ℵϴ✞ℋℑИḠ, Ї ⒿṲϟ† ШѦИ✝ ℙ€ѺṔℒ€ †☮ ℭѺℙẎṔÅϟ†ℰℝℐℵϴ ѦℵÐ ϟṔÅ♏ ✞ĦЇϟ ℭ♓∀† ℱÜℒℒ Ѻ℉ ℱѦḠ$
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors

twitchquotes: Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors, but did you know the chat is all paid commenters too? I can prove it - all the other paid commenters in chat will also post this
twitch chat
March 2018

A very convincing EU > NA

twitchquotes: C9 loses to G2 with First time Top lane Perkz ✅ • TL loses to FNC with a sub jungler debuting for them ✅ • TSM loses to OG role swapping Nukeduck and Patrik and Patrik’s first competitive Neeko game ✅ A very convincing EU > NA
twitch chat
July 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Story of Felipe

twitchquotes: Let me tell you about Felipe. Felipe is good boy from Guadalajara. He wake at 6:00 to make food for white man. He eat his chipotle like a good boy, and clean the taco like a good boy. When he finish burrito he play stonehearth, but Felipe is sad. Felipe say he no win because of Kripp, and Felipe want retribution. Beware your taco kripp, it may have jalapeno poison...
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(

Inflatable seahorse

twitchquotes: This deck is gayer than a malaysian transvestite f*cking a man on an inflatable seahorse
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing