twitchquotes:(=◕ل͜◕=) Daddy, where do dongers come from? (=◕ل͜◕=) ヽ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)ﾉYou see, little dong, when a donger and a dongerina dong together, the dong of the donger releases thousands of small dongs, which dongs the dongerina. 9 dongs later, the dongerina goes through a dong process, which finally raises a donger. ヽ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)ﾉ
(=◕ل͜◕=) Daddy, where do dongers come from? (=◕ل͜◕=) ヽ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)ﾉYou see, little dong, when a donger and a dongerina dong together, the dong of the donger releases thousands of small dongs, which dongs the dongerina. 9 dongs later, the dongerina goes through a dong process, which finally raises a donger. ヽ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)ﾉ
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
twitchquotes:Now little Jimmy what do you do if someone bullies you? "I-Ignore them?" Little Jimmy says. "NO!" His parent screams. The parent leans into his ear and whispers "Delete them..."
Now little Jimmy what do you do if someone bullies you? "I-Ignore them?" Little Jimmy says. "NO!" His parent screams. The parent leans into his ear and whispers "Delete them..."
I'M SO STUPID I'M GONNA SHIT
twitchquotes:YOU SHOULD OF LEROYED OH GOD I'M SO FUCKING STUPID I'M GONNA SHIT
YOU SHOULD OF LEROYED OH GOD I'M SO FUCKING STUPID I'M GONNA SHIT
I used to be a real ad
Are you Reynad's dad?
twitchquotes:I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
NO POMEGRANATES
Teacher: NO POMEGRANATES!!!
NO NO NO NO NO POMEGRANATES!!!
NO!!! I DONT WANT THEM ANYWHERE NEAR HERE, AM I CLEAR!!!
Say the role again, NO POMEGRANATES!!!, say it.
Sarcastic Kids: No pomegranates...
Teacher: NO POMEGRANATES!!!
NO NO NO NO NO POMEGRANATES!!!
NO!!! I DONT WANT THEM ANYWHERE NEAR HERE, AM I CLEAR!!!
Say the role again, NO POMEGRANATES!!!, say it.
Sarcastic Kids: No pomegranates...
"Dick in palm, tissues rigged, with this chant I summon GiG."
Reynad, this is excellent music
twitchquotes:Reynad, this is excellent music. I'm slowly stroking my shaft to it. With each card you drop I grip slightly tighter, the smooth jazz elevator music hybrid piping in my soft supple ears. You sexy bastard you
Reynad, this is excellent music. I'm slowly stroking my shaft to it. With each card you drop I grip slightly tighter, the smooth jazz elevator music hybrid piping in my soft supple ears. You sexy bastard you
Sandown being investigated by the FBI
twitchquotes:༼▀ل͜▀༽ The FBI is currently investigating a possible DDOS attack against Kripparian. It is believed that Sandown masterminded this attack against Kripparian's stream, in order to steal his viewers and promote his own streaming career. It is estimated that Kripparian has lost tens of millions of dollars in the DDOS attack, which Sandown allegedly had executed. Sandown refused to comment on the event when reporters swarmed his house, but he later released a brief statement denying the allegation. Kripparian spoke out later that night stating that he intends to sue Sandown if it is proven that he did commit this cyber crime. ༼▀ل͜▀༽
༼▀ل͜▀༽ The FBI is currently investigating a possible DDOS attack against Kripparian. It is believed that Sandown masterminded this attack against Kripparian's stream, in order to steal his viewers and promote his own streaming career. It is estimated that Kripparian has lost tens of millions of dollars in the DDOS attack, which Sandown allegedly had executed. Sandown refused to comment on the event when reporters swarmed his house, but he later released a brief statement denying the allegation. Kripparian spoke out later that night stating that he intends to sue Sandown if it is proven that he did commit this cyber crime. ༼▀ل͜▀༽
twitchquotes:Hello kripp. This is your mother, I saw that "brofist" you just gave to one of your subscribers. Don't make me come to Athens and make you give him a better brofist. Haven't I taught you better fisting? Love always, mum
Hello kripp. This is your mother, I saw that "brofist" you just gave to one of your subscribers. Don't make me come to Athens and make you give him a better brofist. Haven't I taught you better fisting? Love always, mum
Kripp's handicapped half-cousin from Romania, Kripple
twitchquotes:Dear Kripp, this is you handicapped half-cousin from Romania, Kripple. I need you help for my medical bill. I owe Doctor $5,000 and he only accept 5 dollar bill. Plz help. If I don't pay he take my good leg. Sincerlirino, Kripple J. Morospam
Dear Kripp, this is you handicapped half-cousin from Romania, Kripple. I need you help for my medical bill. I owe Doctor $5,000 and he only accept 5 dollar bill. Plz help. If I don't pay he take my good leg. Sincerlirino, Kripple J. Morospam
Is that your knee or you just excited to see me?
twitchquotes:( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) is that your knee or you just excited to see me? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) is that your knee or you just excited to see me? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
My poop story
twitchquotes:My poop story.
I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened.
That is my poop story.
My poop story.
I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened.
That is my poop story.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
Hello Kripp, Sandown's mother here, Sandup
twitchquotes:Hello Kripp, Sandown's mother here, Sandup. I don't appreciate the excessive amount of brofisting you've been doing to my son's rectum. When he sleeps at night all he can dream about is you welcoming him to the "5 dolla club" as you tear his anus apart and cause it to profusely bleed with your fist and it's all your fault that he's so butthurt!
Hello Kripp, Sandown's mother here, Sandup. I don't appreciate the excessive amount of brofisting you've been doing to my son's rectum. When he sleeps at night all he can dream about is you welcoming him to the "5 dolla club" as you tear his anus apart and cause it to profusely bleed with your fist and it's all your fault that he's so butthurt!
Hello! You have made the mistake of writing "ect" instead of "etc."
"Ect" is a common misspelling of "etc," an abbreviated form of the Latin phrase "et cetera." Other abbreviated forms are etc., &c., &c, and et cet. The Latin translates as "et" to "and" + "cetera" to "the rest;" a literal translation to "and the rest" is the easiest way to remember how to use the phrase.
Hello! You have made the mistake of writing "ect" instead of "etc."
"Ect" is a common misspelling of "etc," an abbreviated form of the Latin phrase "et cetera." Other abbreviated forms are etc., &c., &c, and et cet. The Latin translates as "et" to "and" + "cetera" to "the rest;" a literal translation to "and the rest" is the easiest way to remember how to use the phrase.
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
Leifman talk the mumble automatically go to awkward
I used to be a real ad
I used to be a real ad
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
Already seen these? Discover fresh copypasta here.