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4D mindgames Kripp is playing with his opponent

twitchquotes: What chat is glossing over with this "misplay" is the 4D mindgames Kripp is playing with his opponent. He's making the opponent think he's a terrible player, and therefore more likely to make bad choices, when in reality he's playing against Kripparian the master of salt, and salty plays. He's a real wiz at juking people in a children's card game.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Imagine Fortnite Jonesy in Smash

Imagine this: You're watching the new Nintendo Direct. As it begins you hope to see the new smash reveal, and are hoping you get the character you so desperately wanted, whether it's Crash Bandicoot or Sora. The trailer begins with the classic smash opening. As you watch the trailer, you begin to feel hope that your dream may have come true. But then, at the part where the character is revealed, you hear a bus horn, and wonder "Is it coming from outside?" But no. It's from the trailer. You watch a manly figure drop out of the sky, landing gracefully in front of the characters he is about to defeat. It gazes upon his sharp-bladed pickaxe, his luxurious blond hair, and his shining silver dog tags. As the sun fades away, you finally see who it really was: It was Jonesy from Fortnite. It's a long shot, I know. But imagine.
September 2021

Fortnite

Super Smash Bros

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

NOPERS

twitchquotes: Gﮞ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ D NOPERS Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ͞
twitch chat
January 2021

Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

twitchquotes: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way. He just ran out of thyme. Here today, gone tomato. His wife is still upset, cheese still not over it. We never sausage a tragedy coming. Ashes to ashes, crust to crust. There’s just not mushroom for Italian chefs in today’s world. Want to know what the rough parts of Italy are called? The spaghetto. Don’t call yourself Italian if you weren’t baptized in marinara sauce. You are literally too stupid to insult.
twitch chat
November 2019

Gotta love making jokes with my friends bro

I was driving with a friend I grab his leg instead of the gearstick We both laugh and I unzip his pants I park the car while fondling with his balls, my friend is laughing because he knows it's a joke and we're just friends I start sucking his dick and was about to choke on it because I'm laughing so hard My friend is also laughing his ass off, he starts making train noise while yelling "BROJOB BROJOB CHOO CHOO" He then cums and then I swallow it all and kiss him while both laughing cuz we know it's a joke. Gotta love making jokes with my friends bro.
May 2022
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

SKT logo

twitchquotes: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠸⣔⠀⠤⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡄⠀⡠⢔⡿⠀⠀⢀⡀⠤⠐⣢⠇ ⠀⠘⢍⡐⠂⠴⣌⣁⢐⣧⡶⠆⠀⢠⡶⠦⣾⣒⠁⠁⣼⢃⣈⡡⠧⠐⢂⡩⠃⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⢯⡀⠘⠢⡌⠉⡸⠀⠀⡾⠀⠀⠀⠧⠀⢰⡏⢤⠐⠃⣀⡽⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⢌⣁⠑⢲⠓⠀⣸⠃⠀⠀⡘⠆⠀⡿⠒⢉⣉⡠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣹⣁⣀⣀⣽⠀⢀⣴⣈⣀⣠⡟⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing

I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds. I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching. Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened. I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled. Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
April 2021

Got my cans of spam for quarantine

twitchquotes: ⣿⣿⡿⠋⣭⣭⢹⡍⠉⣭⡍⠻⡿⡉⠹⣿⣯⠉⠉⣿⡟⠉⢩⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠉⠛⠇⠀⠛⣁⣴⠳⠿⠀⢹⣿⢠⡀⠘⢬⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣏⠻⠿⠇⣀⠆⠀⢿⣿⡇⢾⣿⡆⠀⠻⠸⣷⣤⡿⠀⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⣭⣭⢹⡍⠉⣭⡍⠻⡿⡉⠹⣿⣯⠉⠉⣿⡟⠉⢩⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠉⠛⠇⠀⠛⣁⣴⠳⠿⠀⢹⣿⢠⡀⠘⢬⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣏⠻⠿⠇⣀⠆⠀⢿⣿⡇⢾⣿⡆⠀⠻⠸⣷⣤⡿⠀⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⣭⣭⢹⡍⠉⣭⡍⠻⡿⡉⠹⣿⣯⠉⠉⣿⡟⠉⢩⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠉⠛⠇⠀⠛⣁⣴⠳⠿⠀⢹⣿⢠⡀⠘⢬⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣏⠻⠿⠇⣀⠆⠀⢿⣿⡇⢾⣿⡆⠀⠻⠸⣷⣤⡿⠀⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⣭⣭⢹⡍⠉⣭⡍⠻⡿⡉⠹⣿⣯⠉⠉⣿⡟⠉⢩⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠉⠛⠇⠀⠛⣁⣴⠳⠿⠀⢹⣿⢠⡀⠘⢬⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣏⠻⠿⠇⣀⠆⠀⢿⣿⡇⢾⣿⡆⠀⠻⠸⣷⣤⡿⠀⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⣭⣭⢹⡍⠉⣭⡍⠻⡿⡉⠹⣿⣯⠉⠉⣿⡟⠉⢩⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠉⠛⠇⠀⠛⣁⣴⠳⠿⠀⢹⣿⢠⡀⠘⢬⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣏⠻⠿⠇⣀⠆⠀⢿⣿⡇⢾⣿⡆⠀⠻⠸⣷⣤⡿⠀⠸⣿⣿ Got my cans of spam for quarantine
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

You guys need to remove the American flags from the courtroom in NoPixel

You guys 👨 need to remove ❌ the American flags 🇺🇸 and seals from the courtroom 👨 ⚖️ in nopixel. your idea of court 👩 ⚖️ does not represent the American 🇺🇸 judicial system at all and serves only as propaganda 🧐 and is perverting the sense of the judicial system to impressionable youth 👶 . to protect yourselves 🩹 you should probably fix 🔨 it before it becomes an actual legal problem just a heads up 👨 🆙 considering you guys are European 🇪🇺
December 2021

GTA RP

69 nice

twitchquotes: Oh you think you’re funny eh? Yeah you’re so funny commenting nice on a number that represents reproduction. Yeah so funny. Wouldn’t it be nice if somebody came at your doorstep at 4:20 am with a bat that has 69 written on it? Yeah that will be as funny as your joke.
twitch chat
October 2020
What happened to this ad? :(

WHAT DID GEODUDE SAY TO THE BARBER

twitchquotes: WHAT DID GEODUDE SAY TO THE BARBER 🤔 THANKS MOM
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

Quibi is shutting down

twitchquotes: Quibi is shutting down. What’s the fuckin point anymore? Now what am I supposed to do when I go to a restaurant and they tell me my table won’t be ready for another eight minutes? How am I supposed to pass those eight minutes using a cell phone and internet connection without quibi exclusive content only available on quibi? Where else can i get “quick bites” of content streaming directly to my mobile phone for viewing on the go? As if 2020 wasn’t bad enough now I can’t watch any more murder house flip, the show where they renovate houses where human beings have lost their lives at the hands of their loved ones and sell those houses to rich cosmopolitan couples looking to move out of the city? What’s the point? I for one am not “content” with the current state of the “content”
twitch chat
October 2020

the earth is actually a dome

the reality is that the truth is probably somewhere in the middle. just like the flat earth debate, the truth is in the middle. the earth is not round nor purely flat; it is a dome
October 2021

You are currently in a 25 year coma

twitchquotes: If you are reading this message, Jesse, you are currently in a 25 year coma. We've been trying to communicate with you for the longest time by manipulating your brain waves, but nothing so far has worked. If you manage to read this it means our new method has succeeded. Please, wake up Jesse. Your family loves you and wants you back. In a week they are going to pull the plug on your life support, they can't afford the medical bills anymore.
twitch chat
August 2017
Sneaky

what happens when you give t1 viagra?

twitchquotes: what happens when you give t1 viagra? he grows taller
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1
I used to be a real ad

i graduated top of my class from burger king

twitchquotes: you fucking vegan, ill have you know i graduated top of my class from burger king university in burger flipping and have flipped over 9000 burgers in my day you dumb vegan, but you wouldn't know that would you you soy muncher? If you said that to my face I would be flipping patties all over your vegan face and you'd be full of my meat before you even knew what was happening.
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

I am wondering if you are selling cat meat

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan. Hello. I am wondering if you are selling cat meat. I hear from reliable swords that you cook cat regular. Please give me some, I give you my wife. Thank
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Boxing gloves

twitchquotes: boxing gloves Okayge ⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣤⣤⡄⢤⣤⣤⣤⡘⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢻⣿⣿⣿⡎⠝ ⣿⡏⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡎⣿⣿⣿⣿⠐ ⣿⡏⣲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼ ⣿⡠⠜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠃⠾⠿⢟⡋⢶⣿ ⣿⣧⣄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⢰⣾⣿⣿⡿⢣⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠂⣷⣶⣬⣭⣭⣭⣭⣵⢰⣴⣤⣤⣶⡾⢐⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣼⣿⣿
twitch chat
March 2021

Coke Gaming out!

twitchquotes: HI, this is Coke Gaming here In the Twitch stream of Aurateur. We would like to give you lots of money and gifted subscriptions, and maybe you can be on a platform-wide ad! Please be as loud and obnoxious as possible, the louder the reaction the better! Thank you for considering us. Coke Gaming out!
twitch chat
December 2019
I used to be a real ad

I'm not a fan of any team in particular

twitchquotes: I'm not a fan of any team in particular. I'm just a fan of whoever plays the best League of Legends and right now that just happens to be Rush from Echo Fox. Show some respect.
twitch chat
March 2019

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing